Ed: You get your English scores up and I'll recommend that you get accepted into Princeton.
Will: Look, I don't know, Ed, it's just-
Ed: Please, for me. It would mean a lot.
Will: All right, all right, I'll think about it. Hey, peace out, E-Money. [shake hands]
Both: Pssh!
Will: [to Carlton] Piece of cake.

Philip: Wait a minute, Will. Princeton is considering you?
Will: Considering me? Begging me is more like it. I mean, yo, them people just will not take "no" for an answer.
Philip: You turned them down?
Will: A bunch of times. But you know, dude started getting all weepy-eyed and everything so I told him I'd sleep on it.
Carlton: How'd you do it, Will? The truth.
Will: Carlton, I was just myself. I guess that was good enough.
Carlton: This is Princeton, Will. They don't want people who are themselves. They want people like me. Now, fess up.
Will: I told you, Carlton, I was just myself. We talked. I told him about the hood back in Philly. And he told me about some stuff called Spam.

Philip: You know, if you're getting a shot at Princeton, that's pretty impressive. I'm proud of you, son.
Will: Proud enough to let me use the Volvo next weekend?
Philip: Sure.
Will: Did my lips say Volvo? My lips meant to say Jag.
Philip: Why not?
Will: You know what, Uncle Phil, I think I might like this Princeton thing after all. Hey, you think you can show me that handshake?
Philip: Well, okay, but we can't show it to strangers, you know. [they go inside to get away from Carlton]

Philip: So how'd it go, son?
Vivian: Did they accept you?
Carlton: Did you even have to ask? They're not just accepting me, they're giving me a full scholarship.
Philip: Yes! Oh, God. Congratulations.
Vivian: We are so proud of you!
Will: Yeah, good going, C.
Hilary: Can I have your dresser?
Philip: I can't believe this. A full scholarship? That's amazing.
Carlton: I guess all that hard work paid off.

Vivian: Philip, we're gonna have to have a party, invite all of Carlton' s friends.
Ashley: I can't come.
Philip: Why not?
Ashley: Because Carlton doesn't have any friends and I'll have to dance with him.

Carlton: Mom, I appreciate the thought, but let's not go overboard.
Philip: No. Now, this seems to call for a new car. How about one of those little convertibles, huh? Princeton orange.
Carlton: Sure, Dad, but-
Philip: No buts, Carlton. You have made me so proud.
Hilary: I made my bed.

Philip: [answers phone] Hello? It's Mr. Robinson, your principal. Well, you're a little late, sir, I just heard the good news. Well, that's impossible. How could he get suspended after he just got a full scholarship? I'll call you back. Yeah, goodbye. [hangs up]
Vivian: Philip, what's going on?
Philip: Carlton, tell me you didn't threaten to kill the man from Princeton.
Vivian: Oh, my God.
Carlton: Dad, I-
Philip: Just tell me that, please.
Carlton: I can't.

Carlton: Good morning, Will.
Will: "Good morning"? You sure you don't mean, "Die, you gravy-sucking pig"?
Carlton: Will, I spoke out of turn earlier. I had no right to attack you the way I did.
Will: Oh, that's cool, man. Plus, I decided I don't even want to go to Princeton, you know? So I called up Ed and I put the good word in for you.
Carlton: And he's giving me another chance?
Will: Well, no, he still thinks you kind of crazy. But he'd like to take Hilary out for cocktails.