Garrett: So, you tap that?
Jonah: No, I felt bad. And I told her that I wasn't comfortable dating a supervisor, and she was cool with it.
Garrett: Quick thinking.
Glenn: Moving on, one final announcement from Dina.
Dina: [clears throat] Effective immediately, I will be stepping down from my position of assistant manager to associate level so that I may concentrate on... [looks at Jonah] personal matters.

Glenn: Well, I think I speak for everyone when I say that's really, really sad. I know that I'm gonna miss your constant criticism of me a lot.
Dina: I'm gonna miss that too.
Glenn: Sure there's nothing we can say to make you stay?
Dina: Well, you know, there's always...
Glenn: Oh, too bad, so sad. Well, let's have an extra fun chant. Come on, give me a C!
All: C!
Glenn: Why can't I stop smiling?

Amy: You know, she did mention a few weeks ago that her grandmother was sick.
Jonah: Oh, that's great! No, I didn't mean... No, it's, uh... I was just saying, you know, like, if I get that age, somebody put a bullet in me.

Dina: I'm here, reporting for duty.
Cheyenne: Oh, you're gonna be working here? With me?
Dina: Yep. But I don't want this to be awkward for you just because I used to be above you, so go ahead, boss lady. Tell me what to do.
Cheyenne: Okay, well, I'm the boss now, so you better do what I say.
Dina: I make that joke. You don't make that joke. Okay, where do we start? Look at all these fun colors.

Amy: Hey, Glenn, you wanted to see me?
Glenn: Amy, come look out this window with me. See, most people would see a loading dock, but I see a...
Amy: I don't want to be Assistant Manager.
Glenn: But you didn't even look out the window.
Amy: I know. Look, I really appreciate the offer, I do. But it's basically more work for the same amount of money.
Glenn: Since when have you been in this for the money?
Amy: Pretty much from day one.
Glenn: Oh!

Glenn: Okay. I'll figure something out, I guess... but at least come over and look out the window with me.
Amy: It is a nice loading dock.
Glenn: It's a nice loading dock.

Glenn: So I realized the answer to our assistant manager problem has been right in front of us, literally forever.
Amy: You're gonna promote Myrtle?
Glenn: I decided to promote based on seniority, and she has both kinds. Plus, she has leadership experience. She was head switchboard operator for the Pall Mall cigarette company.
Amy: Uh, yeah, but... maybe you should interview some other people first.
Glenn: Well, I'm not very good with interviews. I like just about everybody I meet. I have virtually no standards.
Amy: Okay, well, I could help you find someone. That is, if you haven't already offered Myrtle the job.
Glenn: No... Well, I did, but I don't think she heard me.

Garrett: You need to toughen up. All right, see this dude? Whatever I ask you, the answer is no.
Jonah: What?
Man: I need to return this blender.
Garrett: Oh, okay. Well, it looks like you've got the receipt, It has not been opened, and you purchased it within 14 days. Can I give him a refund?
Jonah: Sorry, no refunds.
Man: What do you mean? Why not?
Garrett: Yeah, it seems like a pretty valid return.
Jonah: I do not have a good answer for that.
Man: So...
Garrett: Why don't we give him store credit? Would that work for you?
Man: Yeah, that's fine.
Jonah: No store credit.
Man: I'd like to speak to your manager.
Jonah: No.
Man: You haven't seen the last of me. [walks away]
Jonah: So what was the point of that?
Garrett: I don't know. I'm bored.

Dina: [sharpens mascara pencil] All right, ma'am. I cannot stress this enough. You need to be... so still. Like a... statue.
Cheyenne: Dina? Do you want me to take over anything near the eyes?
Dina: Nope. I'm fine. Learning on the job.
Cheyenne: Her eyes are so pretty, though. I'm almost wondering, what if you don't do any eyeliner at all?
Dina: Well, we've got to do something to draw attention away from that chin. [to the customer] I said don't move. Or do you want me to strap you into this chair? Don't look at her. She can't help you right now.

Tate: Okay, so, let's address the elephant in the room. Why does a pharmacist want to slum it as an assistant manager? I mean, is this a prank show? Is there a camera watching?
Glenn: Are we being Plunked?
Tate: Just... Truth is, I need a break. Have you ever held a dying man's hand in yours while you had to tell him that we don't accept rewards points for his medication? He literally died while I was holding his hand.
Amy: I don't think that's true.
Tate: Well, I guess we'll never know.