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‘The Summer of George’ Quotes

Seinfeld: The Summer of George

822. The Summer of George

Aired May 15, 1997

After being fired from his job, George is determined to make this the Summer of George. Elaine's new co-worker, Sam (Molly Shannon), doesn't swing her arms when she walks. Kramer gets a job filling seats at the Tony Awards.

Quote from George

George: Hi, I need some party invitations.
Clerk: Okay. Have you been in here before?
George: About a year ago. Wedding invitations.
Clerk: Right. How'd that all work out?
George: No complaints.
Clerk: Well, they are arranged according the price. And as I recall... [flips to the end]
George: Actually, [flips to the front] I'll take these nice glossy ones.

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Quote from Kramer

Kramer: ...so I said to him, "Arthur, Artie, bubala, why does the salesman have to die? Change the title. The Life of a Salesman. That's what people want to see."

Quote from George

George: I can't believe the Yankees really fired me.
Jerry: Well, you had a good run. You took them to the World Series.
George: I got to give the players most of the credit for that.
Jerry: Don't sell yourself short. You made all the flight arrangements, hotels, buses.
George: No, I don't know who was doing that.
Jerry: So, when you actually did work, what it was that you did?
George: I'll tell you, they had a pastry cart that you wouldn't believe.

Quote from George

George: All right, that's enough. I gotta go home and take a nap.
Jerry: It's 10:30 in the morning?
George: What can I tell you? I'm wiped.
Jerry: So, has the summer of George already started or are you still decomposing?
George: Decompressing.

Quote from George

Doctor: Mr. Costanza, your legs have sustained extensive trauma. Apparently, your body was in the state of advanced atrophy, due to a period of extreme inactivity. But with a lot of hard work and a little bit of luck, I think there's a good chance you may, one day, walk again. [leaves]
Kramer: Well, that's good news.
Elaine: Wow, invitations again.
Kramer: Yeah, that's weird.
Elaine: All right. Well... Do you want to grab some coffee?
Jerry: Yeah.
Kramer: I'd like to get some coffee.
[Jerry, Kramer and Elaine leave George laying on a hospital bed in the middle of the corridor]
George: This was supposed to be the Summer of George! The Summer of George!

Quote from George

George: Severance package? The Yankees are giving me three months full pay for doing nothing.
Jerry: They did it for three years. What's another few months?
George: I'm really going to do something with these three months.
Jerry: Like what?
George: I'm gonna read a book. From beginning to end. In that order.
Jerry: I've always wanted to do that...
George: I'm gonna play Frolf.
Jerry: You mean golf?
George: Frolf: frisbee golf, Jerry. Golf with a frisbee. This is gonna be my time. Time to taste the fruits and let the juices drip down my chin. I proclaim this: The Summer of George! [George runs away from a bee]

Quote from Elaine

Elaine: It's like she's carrying invisible suitcases.
Jerry: Like this? [imitates the walk]
Elaine: Yes, exactly.
Jerry: That is so strange.
Elaine: Right. So why I'm the one who gets [purrs]. You know, I mean they were being as catty as I was. It's a double standard.
Jerry: Oh, what about ladies night? Women admitted free before 10?
Elaine: That is so stupid.
Jerry: [purrs].

Quote from George

George: Hey, The White Shadow is on...
Jerry: Boy, you're really packing it all in.
George: Jerry, my vacation just started. I need a day or two to decompress. Besides, I did plenty today.
Jerry: Like what?
George: I bought a new recliner with a fridge build right in to it.

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Oh, the Tony's. I'll see you there buddy.
Elaine: You're going to the Tony's too?
Kramer: Roger that.
Jerry: Where are you sitting?
Kramer: Well, all over the place. Yeah, I'm a seat filler. They don't like to see empty seats on TV so when somebody gets up I just park my caboose on their spot until they get back.
Elaine: How did you get that job?
Kramer: Mickey. Mickey, he hooked me up. He's a member of the academy.
Jerry: What academy?
Kramer: Well, he didn't say.

Quote from Elaine

Sam: Elaine, am I crazy? I just get the feeling that Dugan and the others are making fun of me all the time.
Elaine: Well, You might wanna think about... maybe, uh... moving your arms a little when you walk.
Sam: My arms?
Elaine: You know, sort of swing them, so you're not lurching around like a caveman. [laughs]
Sam: I'm a caveman?
Elaine: No, no, no, no, it's just...
Sam: Everybody told what a catty shrew you are. Your horrible! [runs out with her arms firmly by her side]

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Well, good morning gentleman and Tony says hello to you.
Jerry: You didn't give that thing back?
Kramer: Jerry, it was a whirlwind. They whisked us backstage, the media is swarming, champagne is flowing... Woo! I can't describe how great it is to win.
Jerry: That's because you didn't win.
George: Scarsdale Surprise. That's the musical about that Scarsdale diet doctor murder.
Kramer: Featuring the mind-blowing performance of Ms. Raquel Welch!
Jerry: You haven't even seen it.
Kramer: Aah, Jerry, I'm not gonna let you bring me down off this high. I've been partying all night. I saw the sunrise at Liza's!
George: What, Minnelli's?!
Kramer: No.

Quote from Jerry

Jerry: [on the phone] Can you believe she expected me to squire her around town while the dude sits at home in swaddling clothes?
George: Do they make swaddling clothes for adults?
Jerry: It's like she's put the role of boyfriend into two jobs. Except that the dude plays the showroom and I'm stuck doing food and beverages.

Quote from George

George: What's with you? You look dead.
Jerry: It's Lanette. I need an assistant or intern or something.
George: Relationship intern. [chuckles] Hey, what if two of us teamed up?
Jerry: Not...
George: No, no...
Jerry: No, because that's...
George: No. Listen, we are always sitting here, I am always helping you with your girl problems and you're always helping me with my girl problems. Where do we end up?
Jerry: Here.
George: Exactly! Because neither one of us can't handle a woman all by ourselves.
Jerry: I'm trying.
George: I've tried. We don't have it. But maybe the two of us, working together at full capacity, could do the job of one normal man.
Jerry: Then each of us would only have be like a half man. That sounds about right!

Quote from Kramer

Jerry: Why do they want you to fire Raquel Welch?
Kramer: Because they're terrified of her. I heard from someone that they cut one of her lines, she climbed up the rope on side of the stage and started dropping lights on peoples heads. A story like that has got to be true.
Jerry: She seems very nice.
Kramer: Jerry, you're not in show business. You don't know what these people are like.
Jerry: I'm in show business.
Kramer: Oh, come on! What am I gonna do? She's going to eat me alive.

Quote from George

Jerry: You got the tickets?
George: Yeah, two for the 7:15 of Lenore's Promise. What are you wearing a green sweater?
Jerry: I like it.
George: Well, Lanette doesn't like. Here is your blue one. It's her favorite.
Jerry: What?
George: Just put it on! All right now, remember she had her nails done today so remark how you like the color. And if you need me you beep me, all right. Here you go. Here you go. [sprays mouth freshener in Jerry's mouth] Go get 'em. You're a tiger!
Jerry: Hey, George, one second, she's having a party Friday night and she wants me to take care of the invitations.
George: A little notice would've helped! How many people?
Jerry: 35. And George, on the invitations...
George: I know, I know, don't skimp.

Quote from Kramer

Raquel Welch: "You are a fraud Dr Tarnover. You haven't even been to Scarsdale."
Kramer: [knocks and enters] Ms. Welch.
Raquel Welch: Who are you?
Kramer: Well, I'm Cosmo Kramer. I'm one of the producers.
Raquel Welch: [answers phone] Hello, Sidney! No. No, I told you I don't want to do that! If you bring it up again I will feed your genitals to a wolf! [hangs up] Kids! You're still here.
Kramer: Well, I- Uh, Ms. Welch I do need to talk to you about a little problem regarding your performance.
[Raquel kicks a chair out of her way and walks up to Kramer]
Raquel Welch: What kind of problem?
Kramer: Well, it seems that due to the vagaries of the production parameters, vis-a-vis the fragmenting of the audience due to cable television, carnivals, water parks...
Raquel Welch: Out with it!
Kramer: Well, you're fired because you don't move your arms when you tap dance. You're like a gorilla out there. I've gotta go...
[As Kramer attempts to run out of the dressing room, Raquel Welch drags him back in]

Quote from Elaine

Elaine: Would you just keep an eye out for this woman. She's about yay high and, uh, she doesn't swing her arms when she walks.
Cop #1:What do you mean?
Elaine: Like this... [walks with her arms hanging straight]
Raquel Welch: What the hell is that? Are you making fun of my dancing?
Elaine: Aren't you Raquel Welch?
Raquel Welch: You know who I am. Now, what are you doing?
Elaine: Nothing, I wasn't just moving my arms...
Raquel Welch: That's it. You're going down.
Cop #1: Ooh, cat fight.


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