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The Summer of George

‘The Summer of George’

Season 8, Episode 22 - Aired May 15, 1997

After being fired from his job, George is determined to make this the Summer of George. Elaine's new co-worker, Sam (Molly Shannon), doesn't swing her arms when she walks. Kramer gets a job filling seats at the Tony Awards.

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Well, good morning gentleman and Tony says hello to you.
Jerry: You didn't give that thing back?
Kramer: Jerry, it was a whirlwind. They whisked us backstage, the media is swarming, champagne is flowing... Woo! I can't describe how great it is to win.
Jerry: That's because you didn't win.
George: Scarsdale Surprise. That's the musical about that Scarsdale diet doctor murder.
Kramer: Featuring the mind-blowing performance of Ms. Raquel Welch!
Jerry: You haven't even seen it.
Kramer: Aah, Jerry, I'm not gonna let you bring me down off this high. I've been partying all night. I saw the sunrise at Liza's!
George: What, Minnelli's?!
Kramer: No.

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Quote from Jerry

Jerry: [on the phone] Can you believe she expected me to squire her around town while the dude sits at home in swaddling clothes?
George: Do they make swaddling clothes for adults?
Jerry: It's like she's put the role of boyfriend into two jobs. Except that the dude plays the showroom and I'm stuck doing food and beverages.

Quote from George

George: What's with you? You look dead.
Jerry: It's Lanette. I need an assistant or intern or something.
George: Relationship intern. [chuckles] Hey, what if two of us teamed up?
Jerry: Not...
George: No, no...
Jerry: No, because that's...
George: No. Listen, we are always sitting here, I am always helping you with your girl problems and you're always helping me with my girl problems. Where do we end up?
Jerry: Here.
George: Exactly! Because neither one of us can't handle a woman all by ourselves.
Jerry: I'm trying.
George: I've tried. We don't have it. But maybe the two of us, working together at full capacity, could do the job of one normal man.
Jerry: Then each of us would only have be like a half man. That sounds about right!

Quote from Kramer

Jerry: Why do they want you to fire Raquel Welch?
Kramer: Because they're terrified of her. I heard from someone that they cut one of her lines, she climbed up the rope on side of the stage and started dropping lights on peoples heads. A story like that has got to be true.
Jerry: She seems very nice.
Kramer: Jerry, you're not in show business. You don't know what these people are like.
Jerry: I'm in show business.
Kramer: Oh, come on! What am I gonna do? She's going to eat me alive.

Quote from George

Jerry: You got the tickets?
George: Yeah, two for the 7:15 of Lenore's Promise. What are you wearing a green sweater?
Jerry: I like it.
George: Well, Lanette doesn't like. Here is your blue one. It's her favorite.
Jerry: What?
George: Just put it on! All right now, remember she had her nails done today so remark how you like the color. And if you need me you beep me, all right. Here you go. Here you go. [sprays mouth freshener in Jerry's mouth] Go get 'em. You're a tiger!
Jerry: Hey, George, one second, she's having a party Friday night and she wants me to take care of the invitations.
George: A little notice would've helped! How many people?
Jerry: 35. And George, on the invitations...
George: I know, I know, don't skimp.

Quote from Kramer

Raquel Welch: "You are a fraud Dr Tarnover. You haven't even been to Scarsdale."
Kramer: [knocks and enters] Ms. Welch.
Raquel Welch: Who are you?
Kramer: Well, I'm Cosmo Kramer. I'm one of the producers.
Raquel Welch: [answers phone] Hello, Sidney! No. No, I told you I don't want to do that! If you bring it up again I will feed your genitals to a wolf! [hangs up] Kids! You're still here.
Kramer: Well, I- Uh, Ms. Welch I do need to talk to you about a little problem regarding your performance.
[Raquel kicks a chair out of her way and walks up to Kramer]
Raquel Welch: What kind of problem?
Kramer: Well, it seems that due to the vagaries of the production parameters, vis-a-vis the fragmenting of the audience due to cable television, carnivals, water parks...
Raquel Welch: Out with it!
Kramer: Well, you're fired because you don't move your arms when you tap dance. You're like a gorilla out there. I've gotta go...
[As Kramer attempts to run out of the dressing room, Raquel Welch drags him back in]

Quote from Elaine

Elaine: Would you just keep an eye out for this woman. She's about yay high and, uh, she doesn't swing her arms when she walks.
Cop #1:What do you mean?
Elaine: Like this... [walks with her arms hanging straight]
Raquel Welch: What the hell is that? Are you making fun of my dancing?
Elaine: Aren't you Raquel Welch?
Raquel Welch: You know who I am. Now, what are you doing?
Elaine: Nothing, I wasn't just moving my arms...
Raquel Welch: That's it. You're going down.
Cop #1: Ooh, cat fight.

Quote from George

Jerry: Maybe I should ask her out?
George: She is a good waitress.
Jerry: That's true. Maybe I'll take her to the Tonys.
George: You're going to the Tonys?
Jerry: Yeah, I wrote some jokes to the show and they gave me two tickets.
George: Well, why didn't you ask me? I know a million theater jokes. "What's the deal with those guys down in the pit?" [snorts]
Jerry: They're musicians. That's not a joke.
George: It's a funny observation.

Quote from Elaine

Elaine: Who's that?
Dugan: That's Sam, the new girl in accounting.
Walter: What's with her arms? They just hang like salamis.
Dugan: She walks like orangutan.
Elaine: Better call the zoo.
Dugan: [purrs]
Elaine: What?
Walter: [hisses]
Dugan: Catty.

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Hey, Jerry, you got any Tums?
Jerry: Stomach ache?
Kramer: I drank too much water in the shower.
Jerry: Aah. Top of the fridge.

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