Jerry: Hey, I had the show of my life last night. I ad-libbed like ten new minutes.
Kramer: Yeah, but did you tape it?
Jerry: Right there. I got it. I did this thing on the Ottoman Empire. Like, what was this? A whole empire based on putting your feet up?
Kramer: Yes!
Jerry: I'm telling you, I got like a whole new Tonight Show here.

Jerry: What's the matter?
Elaine: Oh, I was having lunch, and I bit down on the fork.
Jerry: Boy, it's hard to believe with all that biting experience a person could still make a mistake like that.

Kramer: Yow!
Elaine: What?
Kramer: Well, you're getting heavy. Yeah, you look like you put on five, ten pounds.
Jerry: Kramer!
Kramer: I'll tell you something else. You're looking a little chunky yourself, buddy.

Elaine: Where's your bathroom scale? [an exasperated Jerry holds his arms up in the air]

Jerry: What about me?
Kramer: You? You're getting old.
Jerry: Maybe your yogurt isn't so non-fat.
Kramer: Oh, guess again, Tubby!

Kramer: Hey, I'll tell you what, Chubs, if that yogurt has fat in it, I will put myself on an all-yogurt diet for a week.
Jerry: Well, let's start the insanity.
Kramer: Giddy-up!

Lloyd: I ran into George yesterday in the city. [George elbows Estelle]
Estelle Costanza: Ow! What's the matter with you?
Lloyd: So, uh, how's the arm, huh?
George: Oh, it's good. It's good.
Estelle Costanza: What's the matter with your arm?
George: Nothing.
Lloyd: Oh, his arm moves like this.
Frank Costanza: Your arm moves like this?
George: Yeah.
Frank Costanza: I never seen your arm move like this.
Estelle Costanza: Me, either.
George: Well, it comes and goes.
Frank Costanza: It's like some kind of a spasm.

Lloyd: Ooh! I asked Mr. Dinkins if he knew any good orthopedists, and he said he had the best. So, I made an appointment for you. Dr. Dekter.
Estelle Costanza: Mayor Dinkins got an appointment for him?
Frank Costanza: You mentioned George's name to Mayor Dinkins? You discussed George with the mayor of New York?
Estelle Costanza: Dinkins was talking about you. He was discussing you.
George: You know, Lloyd, I've been to the doctor. There's really nothing they can do.
Frank Costanza: Hey, Mayor Dinkins set this up for you. You know what kind of a doctor this must be if Dinkins knows him?
George: All right. All right. I'll go.

Elaine: I'll have a small, plain vanilla in a cup to go. That's non-fat, right?
Joel: That's right.
Elaine: 'cause I'm on a special diet, and the doctor said I can't have any fat.
Joel: Yeah, well, there is no fat.

Elaine: Hurry, Jerry! Hurry!
Jerry: How's it doing?
Elaine: Not too good.
Kramer: Well, you can't have this tested now. It's melting.
Jerry: So what?
Kramer: It changes the molecules.
Jerry: Oh, you don't know what you're talking about.
Kramer: Hey, fatso! I got a 90 in biology.