Nancy: Ow, George! What are you doing?
George: [pops his head out of the covers] Uh... You know, uh... Pleasuring you.
Nancy: Well, stop it!
George: You don't like the move?
Nancy: No. I don't.
George: You're kidding.
Nancy: No, I'm not. It feels like aliens poking at my body.
George: Sorry. I'll just go back to my usual routine.

Kramer: "Call me. Thirty-six, twenty-four, forty-six. I think I have what you're looking for."

Kramer: I just can't get over how fantastic you look.
Estelle Costanza: Oh, really?
Kramer: Oh, yeah. This takes twenty years off.
Estelle Costanza: And it was all done by laser. I don't even need bandages.
Man: [o.s.] Yo, Assman! Look at the Assman!
Elaine: Did he say, "Assman"?
Kramer: Oh, yeah.
Elaine: Oh my goodness.
Man: [o.s.] Hey, the Assman's in town!
Kramer: You got that straight!
Estelle Costanza: Boy. I never dreamed it could make such a difference.

Jerry: You must have done something wrong. You probably screwed up the order. Did you close with the swirl?
George: You're supposed to close with the swirl?
Jerry: Oh. Yes, you close with the swirl. There's a progression there. I told you to write it down.
George: Yeah, yeah. Should've written it down.

Elaine: [interrupts kissing] Hey, let me ask you a question.
David Puddy: Sure.
Elaine: What do you charge for blown shocks?
David Puddy: What?
Elaine: Two, three hundred?
David Puddy: I don't know. Maybe five hundred.
Elaine: Ah. [resume kissing] What about a bad gasket?
David Puddy: Bad gasket?
Elaine: Yeah. Like a terrible gasket.
David Puddy: What is all this?
Elaine: Nothing, nothing. I'm just taking an interest in what you...do.
David Puddy: What kind of car is it?
Elaine: Oh. Any kind of a Swedish car.
David Puddy: All together, that could run about sixteen hundred.
Elaine: Oh. [kiss again] Is that with the parts and labor?
David Puddy: Uh-huh.
Elaine: Hmm. [kiss again] Oh, no. No, David. No, please. Not the knuckle....

Nancy: What's that?
George: What?
Nancy: On- On your hand? Let me see what's on your hand.
George: Nothing. I don't know. Just a little dirt.
Nancy: Give me that. [grabs his hand] I wanna see what's on your hand. "Number one. Take her leg..." Oh, my god! Crib notes? You've got crib notes?!!
George: It's a very complicated move! I couldn't remember it all.
Nancy: Oh, my God, you're sick. [gets out of bed]
George: You know, it's not the S.A.T.s!

Frank Costanza: Assman? I'll get him, Assman!

Jerry: Hi, Mr. Constanza. What's uh...?
Frank Costanza: Where's your friend Kramer?
Jerry: I don't know. Why?
Frank Costanza: Because I'm looking for him. That's why. He stopped short.
Jerry: What do you mean?
Frank Costanza: In a car, with my wife. He stopped short. You think I don't know what that's about? That's my old move! I used it on Estelle forty years ago! I told everybody about it! Everybody knows! [demonstrates] Hmm! I stopped short.
Jerry: Really, stopping short. That's a good move.
Frank Costanza: You're not kidding it's a good move!

Kramer: Hey, Frank.
Frank Costanza: Don't Frank me! I know what you did. How dare you stop short with my wife!
Kramer: Come on, Frank, relax. I don't even know what you're talking about.
[Frank backs Kramer into the table, knocking fusilli Jerry onto the floor]
Frank Costanza: You think I don't know, Assman?!! To think I almost split the profits on the Manssierre with you.
Kramer: Bro.
Frank Costanza: Manssierre!
Kramer: Bro!
Frank Costanza: Manssierre! You...!
[As Frank grabs Kramer and they tussle, Frank falls back onto the floor and screams]

Estelle Costanza: Oh, I was so worried. [grabs a couple of tissues]
George: Ma, don't cry!
Estelle Costanza: Oh, I can't help it!
George: Ma, your eyes!
Estelle Costanza: Oh!