Jerry: She said there's some tractor story that she hasn't told me about.
George: Whoa, back it up, back it up. Beep, beep, beep. Tractor story?
Jerry: Beep, beep, beep? What are you doing?

George: I had them, Jerry. They loved me.
JerrY: And then?
George: I lost them. I can usually come up with one good comment during a meeting but by the end, it's buried under a pile of gaffs and bad puns.
Jerry: Showmanship, George. When you hit that high note, you say goodnight and walk off.
George: I can't just leave.
Jerry: That's the way they do it in Vegas.
George: You never played Vegas.
Jerry: I hear things.

George: Tell you how you could check.
Elaine: How?
George: Reprogram all the buttons, see if he changes them back. You know, the old switcheroo.
Jerry: No, no, the old switcheroo is you poison your drink then you switch it with the other person's.
George: No, it's doing the same thing to someone that they did to you.
Jerry: Yeah, Elaine's gonna do the same thing to Puddy's radio that the radio did to her.
George: Well, that's the gist of it!
Elaine: Quiet!

Elaine: So where is this Sophie?
Jerry: Oh, she's picking me up in a few minutes.
Elaine: How long have you two been together?
Jerry: I dunno. Since the last one. Oh, here she is. You wanna meet her?
Elaine & George: Nah.

George: By the way, how did Puddy get back in the picture?
Elaine: I needed to move a bureau.

Jerry: What's with the fake sneezing?
Kramer: Yeah, we're going down to Mt. Sinai Hospital. See they hire actors to help the students practice diagnosing.
Mickey: They assign you a specific disease and you act out the symptoms. It's an easy gig.
Jerry: Do medical schools actually do this?
Kramer: Well, the better ones. All right, let's practice retching.

Jerry: [answers phone] Hello?
Sophie: Hey. It's me.
Jerry: Elaine?
Sophie: No, it's me.
Jerry: George?
Sophie: Jerry, it's Sophie. I can't believe you don't recognize my voice.
Jerry: Oh, I knew it was you, I was joking. I'm a comedian.

Kramer: You got any ipecac?
Jerry: Ipecac? Kramer, I really think you guys are going too far with this.
Kramer: No, Mickey, he swallowed twelve aspirin.
Jerry: Did he overdose?
Kramer: No, it's just too much.

George: I knew I had hit my high note so I thanked the crowd and I was gone.
Jerry: What did you do the rest of the day?
George: I saw Titanic. So that old woman, she's just a liar, right?
Jerry: And a bit of a tramp, if you ask me.

Jerry: [on the phone] Hi, Sophie, it's me.
Sophie: Hey, Rafe.
Jerry: She thinks it's someone named Rafe.
George: Good, let her think it.
Jerry: [putting on a voice] So, what's going on?
Sophie: Not a lot.
George: Ask about you. Ask about you.
Jerry: So, uh, how are things with Jerry?
Sophie: Oh, I really like him but, well, I still haven't told him the tractor story.
Jerry: Right, right, the tractor story.
Sophie: Are you sick, Rafe? You sound kinda funny.
Jerry: I sound funny?
George: Abort! Abort!
Jerry: Yeah I better get to a doctor, bye. [hangs up] That was close! What drives me to take chances like that?