Dr. Kelso Quote #98
Quote from Dr. Kelso in My Philosophy
Dr. Kelso: Ted, Dr. Koppleman has notified me that he will be vacating the office next to mine. His deteriorating health has made it impossible for him to continue with us.
Ted: Oh, dear, should we send him a card?
Dr. Kelso: Absolutely. See if you can find one that says, "Crippling arthritis or not, I want you out of my hospital by sundown so I can knock down your wall and make myself a giant office."
Ted: You're a wonderful man.
Dr. Kelso: You know, Ted, I don't mean to sound insensitive, but a man's office is a reflection of who he is, don't you think?
Ted: [water leaks] Yeah.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Philosophy’ Quotes
Quote from Turk
Turk: All right, Ralphie, new tack. I want you to do what I do. I want you to imagine that there are tiny men inside your booty, trying to push the dookie. Push the dookie out, Ralphie. Can you imagine that for me?
[later:]
Man: You told my son there were little men inside him? He barely sleeps as it is.
Turk: Sir, I'm sorry. I was wrong.
Man: That was sick.
Turk: But still, if you could do this for me, I would greatly appreciate it. The next time your son has a bowel movement, take the dookie, put it in a Ziplock bag, and just call me on my cell phone. It's for my girlfriend. Hey, Ralphie. Little men, pushing it out, pushing it out.
Quote from Nurse Roberts
Dr. Kelso: Dr. Reid, are you off for the day?
Elliot: Oh, I just didn't have a place to change.
Nurse Roberts: Mm-hmm.
Dr. Kelso: Laverne, I'm going to pretend you're not wearing that.
Nurse Roberts: Don't you usually wait to get home before you do that?
Quote from Janitor
Janitor: Thanks for the pen.
J.D.: Oh, no.
Janitor: Yeah, this was my favorite T-shirt. And this is my favorite skin.