J.D.: When I walk by in a huff, you better look.
Turk: I ain't lookin'.
J.D.: You will look at my huff walk!
Turk: No!

Dr. Cox: Did Dr. Reid get a chance to talk to you about Mrs. Gallin?
Denise: Yeah, she explained my mistake and she told me it was a pretty common one.
Dr. Cox: Did she also get a chance to tell you that we're passing out the World's Worst Doctor Awards and that you're a finalist?
Derek: You don't have to be such a jerk about it.
Dr. Cox: Oh, thanks. Your tiny surgeon brain may now go back to its regularly scheduled programming. Duh...
Denise: He's not gonna stop until you go. [Derek leaves] Look, I know I messed up. Dr. Reid just told me not to sweat it too much since I'm so hard on myself.
Dr. Cox: Seeing as you almost killed someone, if you do feel the urge to "sweat it", you go ahead an jump on that. You damn sure earned it.

Carla: I just bought this yogurt, and for change, they gave me this thing that said "three bendels" on it.
Janitor: That's worth about 40 cents.
Carla: Oh.

Elliot: Maybe J.D. an I should just go for it and move in together, you know?
Janitor: And change begets more change.
Dr. Kelso: I've been missing being a doctor so much, I've been thinking about working locum tenens. You know, temporary family practice stuff.
Janitor: More change.
Carla: You're going back to work? With a second baby, I don't think I can be a nurse full-time.
Janitor: More change.
Jordan: Do you think it would drive Perry crazy if I adopted a couple of Asian kids?
Janitor: OK, that's it. Nobody move!
Elliot: Excuse me. [leaves]
Janitor: Okay, yes, she can move, but that's 'cause she asked permission earlier.
Carla: When?
Janitor: It was before you all got here. She- I- I said I might say "nobody move", and if so, you better not move, and she said "Yeah, but I gotta move just- just over there. I'm still listening." I said, "Oh, that's cool, 'cause we're good friends. I'll see you later." She said, "Yeah, definitely. Let's do something fun."

Dr. Kelso: What do you want?
Janitor: I want you to stop changing your lives, okay? We've been conditioned to think that change is good and exciting. Well, what if it's not? What if it's actually bad and very, very dangerous. In a way that- Hey, noboday move! Nobody mo- [to cafeteria worker] You can move. No one cares about you.
Lady: Honey, how would you feel about my sister and her son living with us for a while?
Jordan: Outstanding!

Elliot: What is your problem?
Dr. Cox: I'm glad you asked. Because it seems no matter where I go in this dump, this unbelievably annoying doctor, Elliot "Somebody", keeps coming up to me and talking to me... Oh.
Elliot: Why would you torch Denise? You know her confidence is shot. Plus, the other day, you even said you liked her, and I know that you were just kidding around, but you never said you liked me, even as a joke.
Dr. Cox: I like you.
Elliot: Really?
Dr. Cox: No.
Elliot: Nicely done.
Dr. Cox: Thank you.

Elliot: You know what I don't get? You've always protected the interns. I mean, you've always been their teacher first.
Dr. Cox: And why in God's name should I waste my time and energy whipping some intern into shape when I know damn sure that as soon he gets the first opportunity, he is just gonna blow right out of this dump?
Elliot: Oh, "he's"... Okay, now I get it. Why don't you just tell him that you're sad that he's leaving, like a normal human being?
Dr. Cox: What are you talking about?
Elliot: Oh, come on, Perry. We both know who you're really mad at.

J.D.: So I'll work somewhere else. We'll still hang.
Turk: J.D., that's not a 37 minute drive. It's an hour and 15 minute drive, round-trip. And I got a wife, I got a kid, I got a kid on the way, I got a new job.
J.D.: I'm in the same boat.
Turk: It's a good boat to be in, though, right?
J.D.: Yeah. So we'll see each other when we can. How about tonight? We'll act sulky so the girls think we need to talk more.
Turk: I'm in. I'm gonna miss your skinny white butt.
J.D.: I'm gonna miss your perfect round one. [they go into hug]
Turk: You wanna pull your pants up first?
J.D.: I'm still not ready.

J.D.: [v.o.] Remember when you were a kid and your family moved and how you always wanted someone to blame for all those big changes?
Janitor: You're still working here for a few more weeks, right?
J.D.: Yep.
Janitor: I'm gonna make 'em special!
J.D.: [v.o.] Luckily, most of us find the courage to tell friends that we'll miss them.
J.D.: Good night, Dr. Cox. [Dr. Cox is silent]
J.D.: [v.o.] Or not.

J.D.: [v.o.] Still, what I remember most is that leaving parts of my life behind always ended up hurting more than I thought.
J.D.: [answers phone] Hello? No, Turk. Don't sweat it, man. If Izzy's alone, you can't leave her. I'm pretty sure that's illegal. We'll just hang out another time. All right, man. Right.
Elliot: He can't make it?
J.D.: No.