David: So we're two minutes late and if this were the actual wedding, the doors would be closed and you would be locked out. Okay? Um, this is Penelope, she's our caterer. Penelope, this is my Dad, who's footing the bill for the food. Stevie is my Maid of Honor, she's just here to eat.

Tippy Bernstein: Moira fucking Rose. Wow. I mean, I figured time stood still in this town, but look at you! You are just as... gorgeous as the day I discovered you.
Moira: Oh Tippy. You're as alive as ever! No, don't get up!
Tippy Bernstein: No, no. Don't worry about it. Cured that vertigo years ago. I hired a hypnotherapist. Then I married her. And then I divorced her. [in a hypnotized voice] You-are-getting-very... broke.
Moira: Ha! [laughs] Tippy, I have missed that vaudevillian charm.

Tippy Bernstein: So, I'm sure you're dying to know what this is all about, and since this isn't sweeps weeks, I won't keep you hanging.
Moira: My imagination has become rather unbridled since you called. Let me guess. A reunion?
Tippy Bernstein: No, it's much, much, much, much better.
Moira: Some sort of televised event? It's a panel? Late night?
Tippy Bernstein: They wanna reboot "Sunrise Bay!"
Moira: What? Who...
Tippy Bernstein: No, no. It's a big, big co-production. All the good people want in. Moira, it's gonna be raw, it's gonna be edgy, and prime-time! A sexy new cast, but they have asked for prominent characters from the original to ground the whole thing. So I called Clifton...
Moira: Alphabetical.

Moira: Have you forgotten that Vivian was killed off?
Clifton Sparks: When has that ever stop us?
Moira: But that last time I was shredded.
Clifton Sparks: That's why we have writers. Let them do their magic.

Alexis: And then they shredded you.
Moira: Yes. Yes. I should have seen that coming after the contract demands but...
Alexis: Okay yes. Re: that drama. I just fell down a dark Sunrise fan-hole and found this message board about conspiracy theories.
Moira: Oh, Alexis.
Alexis: There are a lot of fans who think Clifton Sparks had you written off the show because he was jealous.
Moira: Don't be a dotty, poor Alexis. No I, unwittingly negotiated myself off the show. End of story.

Alexis: Okay. You watch this video and tell me who you think he's referring to then. Come.
[old red carpet video:]
Reporter: There has been some serious Sunrise intrigue around the sudden departure of Vivian Blake. Can you tell us what happened?
Clifton Sparks: [slurring] She had a good run. But let's just say "someone" reminded the producers that there's only room for one head of surgery at Sunrise General. And I think all you housewives at home know who that should be.
[reality:]
Alexis: See, he's basically admitting to having you written off the show.
Moira: He's drunk there.

Alexis: They need you. And all I'm saying is, as your publicist and your daughter, and now the moderator of the Sunrise Bay fan forum, there's more to this story. And if you wanna go through with this after watching that video? Just remember that there is nothing wrong with asking for what you deserve.
Moira: Perhaps a little more housework and little less mouse work might do you some good, Alexis. But thank you for your pair of pennies.

David: Hi. Oh, still eating the tenderloin?
Johnny: Well, they were just gonna throw it out, David.
David: Oh. Um, I noticed that there was some awkwardness earlier at the tasting, and I just got the sense that you were uncomfortable about something.
Johnny: Oh? I don't know why you would think that.
David: Penelope asked if you wanted to crack the top of the creme brulée and you asked, "If we break it, do we buy it?"
Johnny: Well, I think that was a perfectly legitimate question considering I wasn't even hungry after the beef.

Stevie: Mr. Rose, It's not gonna always be like this.
Johnny: You know, we had a sizable nest egg set aside for David's wedding. He was talking about Bali for a while. We were gonna charter some jets. Fly everybody. I'm gonna get some air, Stevie.

Moira: Room for one more?
Clifton Sparks: Muffy, grab a chair. I hope you don't mind, we decided to get a head start on the celebration.
Tippy Bernstein: Extra dry? Extra olive?
Moira: Oh, thank you, Mr. Bernstein!
Clifton Sparks: Hey, tell that cute bartender I'd love a sex on the beach. And if she has time, I need another scotch.
Tippy Bernstein: Ha! You better hurry if you want to catch up.
Moira: Oh no, this doctor would rather nurse her potable, if you don't mind. Best to stay lucid for our congress.