Andy Quote #384
Quote from Andy in Correspondents' Lunch
Andy: Hey, Ben.
Ben: Hi.
Andy: You wanted to talk to me? Or probably not. I mean, I don't even want to talk to me.
Ben: No, I wanted to talk to you.
Andy: Oh.
Ben: I just wanted to thank you so much for your help, Andy. Sorry we didn't wind up choosing the after-school music program. It's just--
Andy: I totally get it. The music program would be effective, but the ambulance is gonna help people right now who are in trouble and will probably look good in the media.
Ben: Yeah, that's... exactly right.
Charles: Your morning tea, Mr. Wyatt.
Andy: Imagine all the money you could save if you didn't have to pay for this expensive stuff. [chuckling] Am I right? You could help, like, a zillion more charities.
Ben: Yeah, that's... also exactly right. I feel like I should have thought of that.
Andy: Well, let me tell you something else that's interesting, Ben.
Ben: What?
Andy: I farted five minutes ago. Didn't even smell it till just now. That's how tight my pants are. Anyhow... Later days, dudes.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Correspondents' Lunch’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Leslie Knope: I have a press conference about the Pawnee Commons in two hours. So I need to go through every email that I've ever sent, ever. I need to know what they might use against me.
Ron Swanson: You can't hack into a typewriter. That's all I have to say.
Leslie Knope: Can it, Unabomber. This is an emergency.
Quote from April
Ben: Andy, are you okay?
Andy: Oh, I'm fine. It's just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I'm always tired. Also, I can't sleep, I'm overeating, none of my old hobbies interest me.
[aside to camera:]
April: Ever since Andy failed the police academy exam, his self-esteem has hit rock bottom. He's always sad and sweaty. He's usually happy and sweaty.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Leslie Knope: Okay, I need more jokes, people. Ben is having his first day at work, so he cannot help me. So I need you guys to pick up the slack.
Ron Swanson: I have a joke for you.
Leslie Knope: Okay.
Ron Swanson: The government in this town is excellent and uses your tax dollars efficiently. [laughs goofily]
Leslie Knope: That's not really a joke, Ron.
Ron Swanson: I disagree. I find it hilarious.