‘Indianapolis’
Season 3, Episode 6 - Aired February 24, 2011
As Leslie and Ron take a trip to Indianapolis for an award presentation, Leslie checks in with Chris to see whether he's cheating on Ann. A reluctant Ben finally socializes with his colleagues when he joins Tom at the Snakehole Lounge. Meanwhile, Andy feels bad that he doesn't have more money to spend on April.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Chris: We talked at your house. Do you not remember this?
Ann: Of course I remember, but we didn't break up.
Chris: I'm sorry, Ann, but I'm certain we did.
Ann: Okay, you said that you didn't wanna leave Pawnee and that I was the most amazing woman you had ever met.
Chris: Which you are.
Ann: And then I said that I would move to Indianapolis if I had to, and you said you didn't wanna make me do that, and then you said that in a different world... Oh, my God. You broke up with me. Oh, my God.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: Yeah, so here's what happened. Sweet and beautiful Ann has never been dumped before, and Chris is such a positive person, when he broke up with her, she just didn't realize it. It's kind of understandable. Although it does kind of make you wonder how good of a nurse she is.
Quote from Ann
Ann: Oh, my God. You left, and you said you were gonna work late, and I kissed you?
Chris: As enjoyable as that was, I did find it odd.
Ann: [sigh] And then I wanted you to meet my parents?
Chris: I'm sure they're great people, but strange.
Ann: This is humiliating. I'm sorry, I gotta go.
Quote from Ben
Ben: Hey, man. I got you another melon-tini.
Tom: Thanks.
Ben: Listen, that guy is a jerk, and if you ask me, he smells like...
Tom: Success! He smells like success. You know what I smell like?
Ben: A teriyaki... hairpiece?
Tom: I smell like the guy who's always coming up short. And you know what? I'm just sick of it. Tommy Fresh was my dream. Now no one's ever gonna smell it but me.
Ben: I can smell your dreams, Tom. I can. And I can smell 'em from here.
[aside to camera:]
Ben: And honestly, they smell [bleep] terrible. But I like Tom.
Quote from April
April: I've got a jar of olives.
Andy: Nice.
April: A thing of toothpicks that look like swords. And a year's supply of toilet paper.
Andy: I got... Boom! $38 in tips.
April: $180.
Both: We should give it back.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Ann: Thanks for driving me. Wait. You're getting your commendation tomorrow at the Statehouse.
Leslie Knope: Oh, please. It's just a goofy ceremony. I don't even care about it.
Ann: Leslie.
Leslie Knope: Besides, Ron is staying behind. He'll go.
Ann: Is Ron gonna be okay?
Leslie Knope: ... I honestly don't know.
Quote from Ben
Tom: It's called a Tommytini. It's just vodka and a bunch of cinnamon.
Ben: That sounds gross.
Donna: Ben.
Ben: Oh, Miller Lite. How'd you know?
Tom: Everybody knows. That's your drink.
Quote from Ann
Leslie Knope: Ann's in kind of a crappy mood because Chris dumped her.
Ben: Ah. Yeah, like a week ago, right?
Ann: Yeah, but I only knew about it an hour ago.
Ben: Oh, so that's why you tried to kiss him. We were all seriously confused about that.
Ann: Who's "we"? What are you... Oh, God.
Quote from Tom
Leslie Knope: Ooh, la la. Look who's fancy.
Tom: Am I wearing an ascot? I didn't notice. Big night at the Snakehole Lounge! It's a launch party for Dennis Feinstein's new fragrance, Allergic for Men.
[aside to camera:]
Tom: Pawnee's own Dennis Feinstein is a real up-and-comer in the world of micro-brewed perfumes and body sprays. His ether-based perfume, Blackout, was named one of Maxim's top hundred ways to trick someone into sex.