Winston Quote #78

Quote from Winston in Secrets

Winston: All right, everybody stop! Wherever you are right now, just sit down! Okay, now, Saturday is a day for sleeping, and damn it, you will not take that away from me! You, give her her scarf back. Finders keepers is not a thing. You, get out of my house!
Holly: Who are you?
Winston: Who am I? Who am I? Well, I am Theodore K. Mullins. And Nick is my lover on the down low. Tell her, Nick. Tell her how it really goes down in apartment 4D. Oh, great Negro spiritual, please come down and loose these chains on this woman! Flesh on flesh. When the lights are off, we are all the same.
Nick: Not true.
Winston: Dear lord, help me, Father! Get out of my house. Get out of my house!

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Features in the collection: Winston Bishop's Pranks and Mess Arounds.

‘Winston Bishop's Pranks and Mess Arounds’ Collection

Quote from Winston in Engram Pattersky

Winston: Gotcha! [laughs] Prank Sinatra, baby!
Cece: What?
Schmidt: I don't get it. The truck is the prank? What, did you pay the rental fee? Winston, that's just nice.
Winston: You didn't have to move.
Nick: Yes, we did have to move, you idiot. We got evicted.
Jess: What is he talking about?
Nick: I have no idea.
Winston: Engram Pattersky. If you rearrange those letters, what does it spell?
Jess: "My greatest prank."
Winston: My greatest prank!

Quote from Winston in Big Mama P

Winston: Oh, she's gonna get hers.
Jess: No, no, Winston, no. What did you do? No pranks.
Schmidt: Such bad timing.
Winston: Hey, Mrs. Parikh. Check your shoe. [Winston snickers] Tickle foot! [laughs] I put a feather in your shoe! [laughing]
Jess: Too small, dude. Way too small.

Quote from Winston in Bully

Nick: You know, I thought I heard the door open at 3:00 a.m. Those are the sounds of true love. Bet she had the time of her life.
Winston: What happened? Did I miss her?
Schmidt: You did.
Winston: Man, I love meeting the girls you bring home. I like to pretend like I'm your lover on the down-low. "Theodore K. Mullins. Damn, Schmidt, in our bed? Where we shave each other? I've always loved you, you're my boo."
Schmidt: Theodore K. Mullins is not my type, man.

 ‘Secrets’ Quotes

Quote from Jess

Jess: When did it start?
Schmidt: 1:03 a.m., February 15, right on schedule.
Cece: Two months ago.
Jess: Two months? Two moons have passed since you started doing it?
Winston: Why do you start talking like a Native American when you get angry?
Jess: Two moons have passed!

Quote from Jess

Jess: Are you ready to run? I have my playlist all ready. Actually, it's Diane Keaton's autobiography, and she just filmed First Wives Club, and it's getting me pumped!
Cece: I totally forgot we were going to run today.
Jess: I e-mailed you, like, three times.
Cece: Maybe you typed "gmoil" again.

Quote from Winston

Winston: Why? Why, Cece?
Cece: Why am I sleeping with Schmidt?
Winston: Is it a pity thing? Is he sick? Are you working for the government? Damn it, he's holding you against your will, isn't he? If he is holding you against your will, blink twice. Blink twice. Are you tired of being turned on? Hmm? You have a mole fetish? Is it huge? I'm sorry. [clears throat] Let me rephrase that. Is it huge?

 Winston Bishop Quotes

Quote from Cabin

Winston: There is this one thing that I miss. I probably shouldn't say, man. I can't.
Schmidt: No, come on. It's us, man.
Winston: Schmidt, I could really go for some crack.
Schmidt: What? Crack cocaine?
Winston: I remember when I was a kid, me, my mom, and her mom, and well, her mom, and then her mom, and then of course her mom, and then my little cousin, Peanut, they'd all rush back to that flaming trash can where we'd sit around and harmonize and just... [sings] Shoo-op. One of those nights I remember, well, we ran out of crack. I'd grab my scarf, and I would run on down to the liquor store where the thugs hang out, and I would try to get a good deal on some crack. [chuckles] Whoo! They never would give me a good price, man, but, uh, I tell you what, there's nothing like the... the feel of a fire, a fresh-baked cookie, and that sweet, sweet taste of crack in your lungs.

Quote from See Ya

Winston: There's not much sunlight left.
Nick: What are you afraid of, the dark?
Winston: No, I'm not afraid of the dark. I'm worried about Schmidt. He's a Jew in the desert. I don't want him to wander.

Quote from Santa

Winston: Jess.
Jess: Yes. Yes, my love.
Winston: Honey, we both know we have been unhappy for far too long. I am not just a vehicle you get to ride to Pleasure Town. Be gone, honky! [throws drink at Jess] This is for your own good. Say good-bye to paradise, honey!