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34Quotes from ‘Something Blue’

How I Met Your Mother: Something Blue

222. Something Blue

Aired May 14, 2007

At Marshall and Lily's wedding, Barney is desperate to hear the news Ted and Robin have been keeping from everyone.

Quote from Ranjit

Marshall: This is by far the drunkest I've ever seen you. Uh, driver.
Ranjit: Hello!
Marshall: Ranjit! Hey, can we make a stop before we head back to the hotel?
Ranjit: You do not have to stop. You can be together as man and wife right back there, and because we are friend I will not watch.

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Quote from Ted

Barney: Oh, my God. You guys broke up. You guys broke up. I can't believe it.
Ted: Barney, story's not over.
[flashback to the restaurant:]
Robin: Can we please not talk about this here. Can we go home?
Ted: Yeah, of course. Uh, excuse me, I'm sorry about this. Can we actually...
Waiter: Oh, my God, it's you.
Ted: Wha... What?
Waiter: You're the son of a bitch who stole our blue French horn.
Ted: Run!

Quote from Marshall

D.J.: Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time ever Mr. and Marshall Eriksen and Lily Aldrin.
Lily: Does it make you kind of sad that we don't share the same last name?
Marshall: You know, in a totally evolved 21st-century kind of way yeah, a little.
Lily: You know what we should do? We should come up with a whole new last name.
Marshall: Oh, that's easy. Lily and Marshall Skywalker.
Lily: Lily and Marshall Hasselhoff.
Marshall: I got it. You ready? You ready?
Lily: Yeah.
Marshall: Lily and Marshall Awesome. Have you met the Awesomes? Marshall, Lily, their son, Totally and their daughter, Freakin'?
Lily: I love you, Mr. Awesome.
Marshall: I love you, Mrs. Awesome.

Quote from Barney

Ted: Wedding's over.
Robin: Yes, it is.
Ted: I guess starting tomorrow, we can tell people.
Barney: Tell people what?
Robin: Hi, Barney.
Barney: Tell people what?
Ted: The food looks delicious, doesn't it?
Barney: Tell people what?
Robin: Nothing.
Barney: Oh, okay. Tell people what?
Ted: Can we talk about this later?
Barney: Absolutely. Tell people what?
Robin: [to a woman] Hi. Have you met Barney?
Barney: Hey. Barney Stinson. Lovely dress. I know, I'm sick of these things, too. It's like the same wedding over and over again. You're totally right. You want to dance? Great, see you out there. Tell people what?
Ted: Look, this is just not something we want to talk about right now, okay, Barney?
Barney: Okay. [Barney leaves]
Ted: Whoo, that was a close one.
Robin: Think he'll actually let it go?
Barney: [over the microphone] Tell people what? Tell people what? Tell people what? Tell people what? Tell people... [A man tells Barney something] There's a black Nissan Stanza in the parking lot with it's lights on. Tell people what? Tell people what?

Quote from Marshall

Lily: Oh, help us.
Robin: What's wrong?
Lily: We're starving. We planned this amazing meal with the caterers, and we haven't had a bite of it.
Marshall: Every time we get near the food, we get cocktail-weiner-blocked.

Quote from Lily

[flashback to a few weeks ago:]
Robin: Conga line.
Lily: Oh, yes, definitely.
Ted: How about a slide show of you guys through the years set to Green Day's "Time of Your Life" and ending with your baby photos side by side.
Lily: Oh, that's great. Going on the list.
Barney: What list?
Lily: Horrible wedding clichés we're not going to touch with a ten-foot limbo pole.
Barney: Oh, like First Corinthians? That Bible verse? They do that at every wedding.
Robin: How's it go?
Marshall: "Love is patient and kind. Love does not envy or boast. It is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on it's own way. It is not irritable or resentful. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
Robin: Lame.
Lily: Going on the list.

Quote from Barney

Lily: Mini quiche. You're a mega-douche.
Barney: Oh, that's right, they moved that table back toward the kitchen, because that's where they're setting up a surprise chocolate fountain. Oh, no, I gave it away. [Lily and Marshall run off] So what was in the glass?

Quote from Barney

Barney: So what was in the glass?
Ted: So the waiter comes up with two glasses of Dom. He says, "Champagne?" "We didn't order any champagne." "Compliments of the house." "Wow."
Barney: You said that already!
[flashback to the restaurant:]
Ted: [v.o.] Right. So Robin looks down, and there at the bottom of her glass...
Robin: Is an engagement ring.
[flashback ends]
Man: [with camcorder] Anything you want to say to the bride and groom?
Barney: Don't get married.
Man: Why don't I come back.

Quote from Ted

Barney: Run? Your strategy was run?
Ted: It was a perfectly good idea. They didn't have our credit card information. They didn't know us from Adam. I stand by it.
Robin: Yeah? And how did that work out for you?
[flashback to the restaurant: As Ted and Robin run out, they collide with a waiter carrying a tray of food]
[As Ted and Robin return to her apartment:]
Ted: I don't see why they had to keep my credit card and driver's license till we bring the horn back.
Robin: Well, come on, Ted, can you blame them?
[flashback to the restaurant:]
Ted: Look, I'm sorry about the French horn. I want to make this right. So what we're going to do right now is, we're going to... run!
[Ted and runs and trips]

Quote from Ted

Ted: So... Argentina?
Robin: Argentina.
Ted: Why is this the first I've heard of Argentina?
Robin: Mmm, American schools suck at geography. What would be the point in telling you that I want to live in Argentina? You don't want to live there.
Ted: I could want to live in Argentina.
Robin: No, you couldn't. I mean, you life is here and your career. I'm a journalist, my career could take me anywhere, and I hope it does.
Ted: Hey. I could be an architect anywhere, too. They have buildings in Argentina. And Paris. And even Tokyo. I don't know if you ever saw Godzilla, but he wasn't knocking down a bunch of tents.

Quote from Barney

Barney: No es posible! Nobody moves to Argentina. The Argentinean peso has dropped two-thirds in five years, the government is opposed to free market reforms, and the railroad has been a mess since the breakup of Ferrocarriles Argentinos. I hooked up with an Argentinean exchange student in a Porta-John outside Yankee Stadium. Man, she was chatty.

Quote from Ted

[flashback to Ted and Robin kissing in her apartment:]
Robin: Wait, wait, wait. We don't want to start having babies right this second. Do you have a...?
Ted. No, I don't.
Robin: Well, we probably shouldn't.
Ted: Yeah.
Robin: Risk it?
Ted: Risk it.
[back at the wedding, Barney notices as Ted is served a bottle of beer while Robin opts for a bottle of water]
Barney: No!

Quote from Barney

D.J.: All right, ladies and gentlemen, if you're all gather around, Lily and Marshall are going to cut the cake.
Barney: No. Robin, you're not... No, say the story's not over.
Robin: Come on, they're cutting the cake.
Barney: Say the story's not over! Oh, God, this is the 12th most worried I've ever been that someone's pregnant.

Quote from Marshall

Ted: All right, have fun in Scotland. If you see the Loch Ness Monster, tell him Ted Mosby says, "What's up?"
Marshall: Nessie's a she, Ted, come on.

Quote from Ted

[flashback to Ted and Robin in her apartment:]
Robin: Right. Okay, let me just go change, and we'll leave.
Ted: Whoa, whoa, you get to change and I don't? Uh-uh. Solidarity, sister.
Robin: That is crazy. I have a change of clothes and you don't. Suck it up.
Ted: Well, if we'd actually moved in together, all my stuff would be here, but we didn't, so...
Robin: Yeah. We were all talk, weren't we?
Ted: We're not doing this, are we?
Robin: I don't want to have kids in Argentina.
Ted: And I don't want to have kids in Argentina.
Robin: So where does that leave us?
Ted: Well, we could stay together and pretend this stuff doesn't matter. Or we could give back the blue French horn.
Robin: You stole a blue French horn for me.
Ted: I would have stolen you a whole orchestra.

Quote from Future Ted

Future Ted: [v.o.] So Marshall and Lily were married, and Robin and I were broken up. And as hard as it was at the time, in the end we both got what we wanted. She did eventually go on to live in Argentina and Morocco and Greece, Russia, even Japan for a little while. And I... Well, I met your mom. I think for the most part if you're really honest with yourself about what you want out of life, life gives it to you. Of course, at that moment, all I really wanted was a scotch and soda and a cigar.

Quote from Barney

Barney: I'm really sorry about you and Robin. I know I was always joking around about wanting you two to break up, but you were really good together.
Ted: Yeah, we were. She just wasn't the one, you know?
Barney: The one. Oh, Ted, no. Do not tell me you're going to start searching for "the one" again. The only time I want to hear you saying "the one" is if it's followed by the word "hundredth." What up?
Ted: No, I need a break from all that, I... I just want to get out there and have fun for a while, you know?
Barney: Really? 'Cause... you know, you've been in a relationship for a year. You're going to... be a little rusty.
Ted: Yeah.
Barney: I'm just saying... you're gonna need, need, need some help out there.
Ted: Could be.
Barney: Ted?
Ted: Yes, Barney.
Barney: Do you think... Do you think maybe you might need a wingman again?
Ted: I do.
Barney: Yes! Yes! We're back. We are back. And Ted, my boy, it's going to be legend... Wait for it...


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