Lorelai: Yeah, we do, but Luke offered, and he has his own tool belt, and the price was right.
Michel: Oh, really? No charge?
Lorelai: No. Well, I did have to give him a coupon for 100 free snuggles.
Michel: How adorable.
Lorelai: Yeah, and to tell the truth, Parker always kind of turned up his nose at my snuggle bucks.

Rory: That was not my doing.That was the board's.
Paris: As if you didn't lobby for it.
Rory: I didn't!
Paris: That secret meeting weeks ago at the pub where you set the putsch in motion... What happened? There wasn't a beer hall available?
Rory: I did not set the putsch in motion. I can't even spell "putsch."
Paris: Nice spin. Take it to K Street.

Logan: [on the phone] Move in with me. Paris' place is a hole anyway. I never liked that you lived there. And that doo-wop group downstairs, I don't think they're an honest-to-goodness singing group.
Rory: Logan, that's really sweet, but I can't move in with you.
Logan: Why not? You're here half the time anyway. You've already got two dresser drawers, and right now, for a limited time, I'll throw in three more drawers and a set of ginsu knives.
Rory: Really?
Logan: No. I have no idea where to get ginsu knives.

Lorelai: Let's talk about your little spat with Luke today.
Michel: What did he tell you?
Lorelai: He said you yelled at him.
Michel: Oh, what a crybaby.
Lorelai: He's not a crybaby. He doesn't like being screamed at by people he's doing favors for.
Michel: Did you check his diaper? Maybe he's just upset because you forgot to change him today.

Lorelai: So this is a hat thing?
Michel: I just don't like Luke's system. He misses many things that needs to be fixed. Many things.
Lorelai: Well, so jot them down.
Michel: That's not how we make the list.
Lorelai: So type them up.
Michel: No! We make the list at Weston's over coffee. That's what we do when we make the list. We go once a month to Weston's together, and we sit, and we decide on the work for the handyman. That's our thing. We get very large coffees, and we split a slice of red-velvet cake, and we gossip, and I eat the whole cake, and you never tell anyone.
Lorelai: Oh, Michel, I liked our trips to Weston's.
Michel: Oh, yes, that is what I do when I like something. I cut it out of my life completely.
Lorelai: I didn't cut coffee with you out of my life.
Michel: Oh, then you just forgot? How special those times must have been for you.
Lorelai: It's just been crazy around here, and, well, it was nice to save a little money with Luke.
Michel: Money isn't everything, you know. People come to work for more than just the money. Although my direct deposit was late again. Maybe that's something you can finally get around to looking into.

Emily: Luke, you eat so little.
Luke: My motto is "everything in moderation."
Richard: Smart. Very Walden-esque.

Lorelai: [on the phone] Hey, kid, what's going on?
Rory: Not much. Having a bad reaction to an onion brick.
Lorelai: What part of onion brick do you not understand?
Rory: I gave Dad his tour today.
Lorelai: Yeah?
Rory: It was nice. He saw the campus, we had dinner.
Lorelai: Oh, how very 7th Heaven of you.

Lorelai: [on the phone] Where is it?
Rory: The Taft building, right off campus, top floor.
Lorelai: Top floor?
Rory: Cool.
Lorelai: Good view?
Rory: Great view.
Lorelai: Awesome. How many rooms?
Rory: Dad told you, didn't he?
Lorelai: Oh, come on, I was doing so well.
Rory: Please.
Lorelai: How did you know?
Rory: Are you kidding me? "How's the view? Is his place nice?" You didn't call me Hester Prynne once.

Lorelai: [on the phone] You're gonna have to tell me how it is living with a guy before I let Luke move in. If it's too creepy, he may have to stay with Babette.
Rory: I will.
Lorelai: I've heard some horror stories about toilet seats you would not believe.