Lorelai: What else do you have in here?
Luke: Just stuff.
Lorelai: First-aid kit?
Luke: In case we got hurt.
Lorelai: Baggie full of batteries for...
Luke: The flashlight. Illuminates up to 50 yards.
Lorelai: Bug spray, radio, granola bars freeze-dried spaghetti?
Luke: Just add hot water, eat it out of the bag.
Lorelai: Am I going to find hot water in there?
Luke: You got to heat it up on the stove.
Lorelai: Oh my god.
Luke: It's a bowie knife to cut fish, cut tree limbs...
Lorelai: Amputate a leg?
Luke: Not a leg. It could do a foot.

Logan: Why are you up?
Rory: It's 11:04. The whole world is up.
Logan: Keith Richards isn't up. Pete Doherty isn't up.
Rory: Rory Gilmore is up.
Logan: She shouldn't be. You're making me dizzy.
Rory: I forgot my Thucydides.
Logan: Don't see how you can function without your Thucydides.

Sookie: I'm experimenting for the prefix menu for Valentine's day next week, trying to come up with something new, but there's nothing new under the sun. I mean, who else would think to serve oysters on Valentine's Day? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 12,000 other establishments within spitting distance!
Lorelai: Well, lovers love oysters. I don't. I love burritos. But people don't want burritos on Valentine's Day.
Sookie: But how do we know unless we give them the option, huh? That's it, I'll serve burritos.
Lorelai: Sookie, no.
Sookie: But no one else will have burritos.
Lorelai: Sookie, you can't serve Valentine's day burritos. That's flirting with disaster. We could be talking the octopus-ice-cream disaster of '98.
Sookie: Oh, God, you're right. I'll figure it out. I'm just hitting an oyster wall here.

Lorelai: Also Luke says Valentine's day is just another one of those fake things, like Mother's Day, created by greeting-card companies. And it is.
Sookie: Actually, it's not.
Lorelai: Really?
Sookie: I'm printing a history of Valentine's Day to go on the tables... It goes back like 2,000 years.
Lorelai: Oh, well, then, it must have been a greeting-card company in Roman times. You know, the one that came up with Gladiator's Day.

Rory: I need every proof sheet on my desk by 5:00 and not a second later. Make that very clear to them, okay? Okay. I know the boys in the lab can be jerks to women, but don't let that stop you. Girlpower, baby. Betty Friedan's dead, and we've all got to fill the vacuum.

Lorelai: Ooh, and here, of course, is the big-time Martha's vineyard thing, whaling.
Luke: They have whaling?
Lorelai: Not anymore. It's just a fun fact. "Martha's Vineyard was one of the world's largest whaling ports." Says here people used every part of the whale back then, the most important being spermaceti, used in candle production. Yuck, couldn't think up a less gross substance to use for candles?
Luke: You know, it's a good thing I don't drive a compact.
Lorelai: Herman Melville once shipped out of Martha's Vineyard. Here's a quote from Moby Dick. "Oars, oars, grip your oars, and clutch your souls now. My god, pull, men!" Wait a second. That isn't the pulling they had to do to get the spermaceti, is it?
Luke: I don't think so.

Lorelai: Hi, Logan.
Logan: Welcome, and this must be Luke.
Lorelai: Oh, no, I dumped Luke. This is Clem. I picked him up at a truck stop on 95. We were at the register, paying for our blue plates, and our hands reached for the same Dixie Chicks cassette.

Lorelai: Smell that air... sea-y.
Luke: Yeah, there's sewage somewhere, too.
Lorelai: I'm loving this. It's been forever since I've been to the beach. Can you imagine living here?
Luke: Wonder what real-estate prices are like.
Lorelai: Probably pretty high.
Luke: Bet you the Average Joe can't afford it, that's for sure. If you work here, you can't live here, so you have to commute hours every day.

Lorelai: I needed that, especially after that jog we took.
Rory: From the dressing room?
Lorelai: Yeah, it was at least 20 yards. Plus the three steps we walked up to get in the building.
Rory: That was some gnarly cardio.
Lorelai: What is it about cucumber water that makes it so much more refreshing than non-cucumber water?
Rory: I think it's the cucumber.

Lorelai: I'm sorry, but this picture just does not compute.
Rory: Stop.
Lorelai: You're wielding a knife. That's verboten in Gilmore world.
Rory: You forget that I'm a rebel.
Lorelai: And you're wearing an apron.
Rory: It's so my clothes don't get wrecked.
Lorelai: You've not worn an apron since you saw The Sound of Music and you put one on so you'd look like Sister Maria, and you made a big crucifix out of popsicle sticks.