Rory: And, already, you are way ahead of a lot of people as far as parenting skills go. Like Britney. Britney Spears does not know which end of a baby goes up. And Courtney Love? She's no June Cleaver.
Lane: Yeah, I bet I could be a better mother than Courtney Love.
Rory: My sock drawer could be a better mother than Courtney Love. But, yes, of course you would be. And Michael Jackson. You know not to name a child "Blanket."
Lane: I do know that. Do not name your baby after an inanimate object.
Rory: See? Way ahead of the pack.
Lane: Yeah. Hey I wonder if Blanket ever met Tom and Katie's baby, Pillow.
Rory: Yeah, that would be a perfect playdate.
Lane: Yeah, when it's nap time, they would be totally set.
Rory: And then they could invite Gwyneth's Apple over afterward for a little snack.
Lane: Banjo, Rachel Griffiths' baby, could play for them.
Rory: And then they could all jump in Mia Farrow's Satchel and make fun of, uh... what's his face?
Lane: Oh, Pilot Inspektor Lee.
Rory: Yeah. [both chuckle]

Rory: So why'd you get up so early?
Lorelai: Mm, well, couldn't sleep. And, initially, I was at a loss. I mean, how would I pass the time until my one and only offspring, the fruit of my loins-
Rory: Too early.
Lorelai: ...loin fruit that she is, straggled out of bed to grace me with her presence? But then I asked myself, "W.W.T.B.F.C.D.?" And it came to me in a flash. "I'm gonna make waffles."
Rory: "What would the Barefoot Contessa do?"
Lorelai: Exactly.
Rory: Barefoot's one word.
Lorelai: Shut up, loin fruit.

Kirk: It's a diner, Luke.
Luke: A diner called Kirk's?
Kirk: It's the name my mother gave me. Top you off there, Jake?
Luke: Why are you doing this?
Kirk: I just saw a need, and I filled it. Seemed to me Stars Hollow was in want of a real neighborhood joint, a watering hole where the townsfolk could mingle, a place where a fella could come and get a piece of pie, a cup of arbuckles', and a soupcon of small-town charm.
Luke: Yeah, well, Stars Hollow has already got that place. It's right across the street. It's called Luke's. Luke's. Ring any bells? Sounds a little like Kirk's, doesn't it?
Kirk: Luke, if you are suggesting that you were the very first person to ever think of naming a restaurant after yourself, I think that Denny Arby, and Tony Roma might have something to say about that, not to mention Mr. Chuck E. Cheese.
Luke: Chuck E. Cheese? Chuck E. Cheese is not a person.
Kirk: Luke, do you think a giant mouse opened a national restaurant franchise by himself?