Michel: There's a couple here I thought I recognized but I was not sure. So I consulted an old guest ledger from the Independence Inn and found a physical description that confirmed their identities.
Lorelai: Physical description?
Michel: Yes. I had described them with astonishing accuracy, down to the crooked eyes and unsightly moles.
Lorelai: You have a system of describing what people's moles look like?
Michel: Mm-hmm. Moles, freckles, estimate of weight, are they buxom, is their chin cleft, do they walk with any sort of limp, et cetera, et cetera. But this is beside the point. You remember the Bathrobe Bandits.
Lorelai: [gasps] No.
Michel: The married couple, from Massachusetts that stole bathrobes from the Independence Inn every time they came. We called them the Bathrobe Bandits. They are here.
Lorelai: Did they bring their moles?

Lorelai: Sookie! Honey, what's wrong?
Sookie: [sobs] I just- It's just- It's just so sad! Ugh!
Lorelai: People magazine! Jackson, you know we don't allow soft human interest stories around Sookie when she's pregnant!
Jackson: She must have snuck it in!
Sookie: I just felt like they were perfect for each other, you know?
Lorelai: Uh-huh. Who, honey?
Sookie: The two of them! The one with the hair, and the teeth, and the... you know!
Jackson: Who's got hair and teeth?
Sookie: And the Divine Brown thing that happened, and bammo! Their loves in the toilet!
Lorelai: We're talking Elizabeth Hurley and Hugh Grant.

Lorelai: She was so serious. You know how she gets really serious, like when she saw The Way We Were and she couldn't believe that Hubbell was going to leave Katie after she had the baby?
Sookie: Oh, I remember. She talked about it for weeks.
Lorelai: "How could he do that? She was the only one who cared about the blacklisting. She was the only one who thought he could write a novel." On and on and on. That's the face she had on today.

Lorelai: Okay, so you know what's great about this country?
Luke: Nope.
Lorelai: If you try hard enough, you can eventually find a showing of St. Elmo's Fire on the big screen.
Luke: Yes, that's what gets us the good seats at the summits.
Lorelai: Come on! Admit it! Rob Lowe pretending to play the saxophone was incredibly hot.
Luke: Oh, I admit it.
Lorelai: And, also, Andrew McCarthy at his best, though Less Than Zero runs a very close second.
Luke: I'm sure it does.
Lorelai: You hated the movie!
Luke: Although, I love the fact that it got me out of a town meeting, so... all in all, a very successful evening.

Michel: With your permission I'm going to remove their bathrobes from their room as a preventive measure.
Lorelai: No, no, no. Michel, come on. If they steal robes, we can just charge their credit card.
Michel: And if they take a credenza! Or a couch! You think they'll stop at robes?
Lorelai: Then I'll start jotting down mole locations along with you. But for now, let's take a flyer on them.
Michel: I should never tell you anything.
Lorelai: Promise?
Michel: I'm going to leave a vaguely threatening note in their room.

Emily: [on the phone] I have no idea what to put on. I'm in a blind panic and it's all your fault.
Lorelai: How is it my fault?
Emily: Because I used your line and it worked!
Lorelai: What line?
Emily: "Hello."
Lorelai: Hello is not my line. Hello is not a line. Hello is hello.
Emily: Well, all I know is I hello-d him today and now he's taking me to dinner.
Lorelai: Mom.
Emily: If you don't get over here right now I'm going to book a DAR function at the Dragonfly every single weekend from now until I die!
Lorelai: I'll be right there.

Jackson: Sookie, I'm home.
Lorelai: I'm home, too!
Jackson: Were we followed?
Lorelai: I don't think so. Good thing we ditched that Audi in Marseille, now we just have to find that tracking device.

Sookie: It may be mean, but when I worry too much about how I'm treating Jackson, I just remember Brandy.
Lorelai: Brandy?
Sookie: Christopher's Brandy.
Lorelai: Christopher's Sherry?
Sookie: Oh. [chuckles] I knew it was something like that.

Sookie: Milk chocolate and artichoke hearts!
Lorelai: What?
Sookie: That's what I want and I am not going to change my mind. Milk chocolate... bell peppers! Now I'm not going to change my mind. Jackson, I figured it out! No, dark chocolate. Ooh, taffy! Taffy and walnuts! Taffy, ooh, pistachios! Ooh, hearts of palm!

Rory: Paris, please don't compare our reading speeds again. You're fast, I'm slow, enjoy your trophy.
Paris: I need the exact time of today's sunset.
Rory: I'm in the middle of an article.
Paris: Well, if you read faster you wouldn't be.