‘The One with the Screamer’
Season 3, Episode 22 - Aired April 24, 1997
Ross tries to convince Rachel that her date is an aggressive bully, but everybody thinks he's just jealous. Meanwhile, Phoebe spends days on hold with the phone company, and Joey is hurt when Kate gets a job in Los Angeles.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: Can you take a duck and a chick to the theater?
Monica: Of course not.
Chandler: Okay. I just wanted them to hear it from somebody else.
Quote from Chandler
Joey: So? What'd you think?
Chandler: Almost as good as the play with the two naked girls on the seesaw.
Joey: I wasn't in that.
Chandler: I know.
Quote from Monica
Caitlin: So how'd you guys meet?
Pete: Well, the short version is, I pursued her for a couple of months, then I gave her a check for $20,000 and she was mine.
Monica: And in the long version, I dump him for telling people the short version.
Quote from Joey
Joey: Let's get your feet up there. Good night. Sweet dreams. I'm gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
Quote from Joey
Joey: Sorry I'm late. My duck and my chick had a fight. It was ugly.
Quote from Joey
Joey: What about us?
Kate: Last night was wonderful. But I can't stay here just for you.
Joey: So stay for the museums.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: [to the chick and duck] All, right, fellas, back to Nintendo.
Quote from Monica
Monica: Yeah, last time I was at Pete's we just watched a movie. Of us. That we'd made earlier. I'm sorry, I can't help it. I have a boyfriend!
Quote from Monica
Monica: Hey, you hanging in there? You doing okay?
Phoebe: [sleepily] Uh-huh.
Monica: You listening to me?
Phoebe: [sleepily] Uh-huh
Monica: Okay. If Pete calls again, and you don't put him through I will kill you.