Robert: Okay, I appreciate all the advice. It still won't help me with my problem.
Debra: What is it, Robert?
Robert: Well, Amy's a lovely girl, you know, she's feminine delicate, attractive. And look at me.
Ray: Well, you really can't change that, Robert.
Debra: Ray. What are you talking about, Robert? You're a very good-looking guy.
Robert: Nah, I'm the Hulk.
Ray: Oh, come on. Come on, Robert, you're not green.
Robert: I'm just not comfortable with my appearance. Never have been.

Debra: Ray, is this because of what I said downstairs about Robert?
Ray: Downstairs, about Robert? Something about how handsome he is? How if you could do it all over again, you'd marry him?
Debra: Now, come on, I never said anything like that.
Ray: Well, you were about to, but you stopped when you saw the wart hog you're stuck with for life sitting next to you.
Debra: You don't think I think you're attractive?R
Ray: [gargles mouthwash] I do. I just never knew that you thought Robert was more attractive. Let me tell you something, I grew up with Robert. I've seen parts of him that aren't so pretty. I've been in a tub with this guy.

Debra: Honey, listen, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were so sensitive about your looks.
Ray: Well, who said that? I never said that. It's the teeth, right?
Debra: What?
Ray: Yeah. Not all the teeth. The top teeth are okay. [pulls lower lip] But the bottom teeth, look. Ugly, right?
Debra: Well, that. There, see? I knew it.
Ray: You know, I'm a lot better-looking with a suntan.
Debra: I don't believe this.
Ray: You shouldn't look at my face when it's relaxed. 'Cause I'm a lot better-looking when it's flexed. You know, it's hard to talk like this.
Debra: Please keep it flexed then.

Robert: Any one of you happen to catch the sunrise this morning? Beautiful. You had a date.
Frank: I didn't know. Good for you. It's about time. It's like riding a bike, huh?
Robert: No, there was no cycling. Amy is 100% lady. We spent the evening enjoying fine food, conversation and we split a clip at the shooting range.

Debra: I'm glad you're here. Look at this. Chocolate pudding, spaghetti sauce, and grape juice. It's like a prison riot here. Thank God they're all asleep.

Debra: Honey, what did you do?
Ray: Nothing. Nothing.
Debra: Well, I mean, what did you do to your-
Ray: It's my normal hair. Don't touch it.
Debra: And you have a tan, don't you?
Ray: No, no.
Debra: You do.
Ray: No.
Debra: [giggles] You went to one of those places.
Ray: For... For health reasons.

Ray: Okay, but I look better now, right? Still not as good as Robert, right? As good as Robert? You said that he was the handsome one.
Debra: Yes, Robert's handsome, but he's not who I'm attracted to.
Ray: Then, who is it?
Debra: It used to be you, Ray. Come on, what do you think? All this stuff makes you sexy? This stuff is not you, Ray. And that's not what I want. I want my regular Ray. That's the Ray I've always wanted.
Ray: Are you saying, then, that I'm sexy? [Debra kisses Ray] I think I might need a little more convincing.
Debra: God, who did your hair, Jiffy Lube?
Ray: It's the Deluxe Finisher model.

Robert: So you put this on your face?
Ray: Yeah. You just dab it under your eyes, that's all.
Robert: Let me ask you. I like that.
Ray: [sniffs cologne] Oh, wow, that's got a little giddyup to it.
Robert: Yeah.
Ray: You know, don't spray it on your wrist.
Robert: Right.
Ray: What you do is, you spray it in the air, and then you just kind of walk through it.
[As Ray walks through the mist of cologne, he notices Frank has walked into the room. Ray sheepishly sits back down and waits for Frank to pass judgment.]
Frank: You know, I've got this dry patch here. You got anything that could help me with that? You know, like a little flakiness?
Robert: Exfoliant, yeah.
Ray: Exfoliant.