Debra: Hey, Peter. Oh my gosh, you look so...
Ray: Normal.
Peter: Well, thanks. You know, Ray suggested nose-hair clippers, and that kind of got the ball rolling.

Ray: Come on, let's get you a drink. He will be back in a minute, ladies. Robert, set him up.
Peter: Well, I think I will have a sloe gin fizz, barkeep.
Robert: You'll have a beer.

Ray: This is great. We got us a little shindig here. [opens door] Agh!
Peggy: Hello, Ally's dad.
Ray: Hello... Peggy.

Robert: Hey, Ray, isn't that the cookie lady, the one who beat you up?
Ray: Yes. No. I mean... It's her, but she didn't beat me up.
Robert: Yeah, right. Doesn't Debra know that you hate her?
Ray: Of course.
Robert: Gotta love Debra.

Ray: Hey, I want you to meet my friend Leslie.
Carol: Carol.
Ray: Carol, Carol. Yeah, Carol's my buddy Andy's sister. Yeah, and the good part is she doesn't look anything like Andy. Ha ha. All right, let's have a drink. Let's drink.
Debra: Hey, Peter, you know, Peggy's into science fiction.
Peter: Really?
Ray: I'm sure Carol's into science fiction too. She wears glasses.

Ray: Hey, hey, why did you invite her? What if they start dating, huh? We already have enough horrible people in this family.
Debra: Would you stop? Robert, can you get Peggy a drink?
Robert: Of course! Raymond, your bartender's gonna be mixing up a little love potion.

Debra: So can I get you two anything else?
Peggy: Debra, this is the funniest thing. We just realized that we were both at the same science fiction convention in 1986.
Peter: You know what? I bet you saw me there. I was Yoda.
Peggy: [gasps] I was Princess Leia!
Robert: Aw, look at these two, Ray. It's kismet.

Marie: [enters] Hello, dears. Oh, what's all this?
Amy: Hi, the opera tape broke.
Debra: Marie, Frank, hi.
Marie: I'm sorry, Debra. I had no idea you were having a party, because I wasn't invited.
Debra: You know, we wanted to invite you, but we didn't think it was your kind of party.
Frank: I see booze.
Debra: You know what? Why don't you just take a bottle and go? Hey, Ray, get 'em a bottle of anything they want.
Ray: Oh, no, I mean, why can't they stay, Debra? Huh? They're fun people. Why can't my charming parents sit down and delight us with their comments and opinions?

Debra: Look, I'm sorry, but this party is kind of just for people who are looking for a spouse.
Frank: I'm in. [walks over to two women] Hello, ladies.

Ray: That's right, Dad, there's lots of ladies here. Here. Why don't you sit down? Sit down and just talk to talk to people. And, you know, don't be afraid to eat eggs in front of everybody.
Marie: Debra, is this what you're serving? Oh, don't worry. I'll save your party.