‘The Night Before’
Season 3, Episode 1 - Aired April 12, 2022
Erin and friends decide to break into the school to get a look at their GSCE results the night before they're released after Sister Michael implies they have not done well. Meanwhile, Granda Joe refuses to admit his new cat, Seamus, is a menace to the local pet population.
Quote from Clare
Clare: I don't think I've ever seen you outside of your wee shop.
Michelle: I didn't even know you had legs.
Dennis: Are yous gonna get something, or not?
Clare: Well, is there anything in particular you'd recommend, Dennis?
Dennis: No.
Clare: OK, well... ..we're just having a bit of a read, and then...
Dennis: Bit of a read? This isn't a fucking library, girls.
James: It is a library, Dennis, it's... It's a video library.
Dennis: Ah. [chuckles] GET OUT!
Quote from Michelle
Michelle: We used to sneak in here all the time. Oh, the things we got up to on them crash mats, girls.
James: Thank you, Michelle.
Quote from Erin
Clare: What are we playing at? This is breaking and entering, girls!
Erin: It's not breaking and entering, Clare, the door was open. It's... entering.
Clare: I think I'm coming out in a rash!
Quote from Orla
Paddy: What are you doing here, girls?
Orla: Breaking and entering.
Clare: No!
Erin: Shut up, Orla!
Quote from Michelle
Michelle: Netball.
Hans: What?!
Michelle: We are here for netball practice.
Hans: It's a bit late, isn't it?
Michelle: Christ, would you look at the time?
Hans: Listen, girls. I'm gonna ask yous something now, and I want yous to give me an honest answer. Is that clear?!
Quote from Michelle
Hans: Thanks for giving us a hand, girls. Honestly, can't thank you enough.
Paddy: Christ, the amount of crap we had to shift. We thought we'd be here all night.
Michelle: No sweat. Sorry, what's your name?
Hans: Hans.
Michelle: Hans?!
Paddy: Hans?
Hans: Yeah, Hans.
Michelle: What, is that like a nickname?
Hans: No, it's a first name, you know, like Hans Christian Andersen.
Erin: That's very unusual.
Hans: Isn't it just? Yeah, my mother, she was Danish.
Paddy: Was she now?
Hans: She was, yeah.
Paddy: I never knew that.
Hans: Well, now you do.
Quote from Michelle
Hans: I think that's the last of it, girls. Let me give you something for your trouble.
Erin: Awk, not at all.
Clare: It's far too much.
Michelle: [grabs money] Cheers, Hans.
Quote from Clare
Police Officer: Sir.
Clare: [stands up] Sir!
Michelle: Oh, dickhead!
Chief Inspector Byers: Please, sit down.
Quote from Granda Joe
Joe: Ah, Jim. What about ya?
Jim: You remember Cara?
Joe: Not your Kathleen's girl? Jesus, she's shot up!
Jim: Aye, she's staying with me this week, so she is. Past her bedtime, though, now.
Cara: Wise up, Granda!
Mary: Jim was wondering if we've seen Cara's rabbit, Da.
Gerry: Oh, dear Jesus.
Joe: A rabbit?
Mary: Yeah, Cara's rabbit went missing, Daddy. They were wondering if we might have seen it.
Joe: Right.