Carla: Low, Sammy, real low. Not worthy of the king. Entering Nick Tortelli country.
Sam: Hey.
Carla: King Woody. It does have a ring to it.
Sam: Yeah. Yeah, I'll be right-
Carla: Yeah, say it Sam, see what you think. King Woody. [bows as Woody enters] Your Grace.

Rebecca: Afternoon, Woody.
Woody: Oh, yeah, hi.
Rebecca: Are you okay?
Woody: Oh, yeah, sure. Great. Oh, you wouldn't want to know anyway.
Rebecca: Well, of course I would.
Woody: Really?
Rebecca: Very much.
Woody: You sure?
Rebecca: Yes.
Woody: Honestly?
Rebecca: When was the last time someone actually struck you?
Woody: Well, see, I'm, uh, trying out for this part in a play. It's a really important part, and it's a really well-known play. Uh, Bus Station.
Rebecca: You mean Bus Stop?
Woody: Oh, I'll never get it.

Sam: [snickers] This is great. He's gonna be so worried about his dumb play, he's probably gonna forget all about the bet.
Carla: At least his memory loss isn't from senility.
Sam: Gee, I'm so glad you're on my side, Carla.

Woody: See, the thing is, the audition's tomorrow, and I don't have a chance to work with any of the other actors to prepare my part. Actors have to do that, you know. Say, Miss Howe, do you think maybe you could read with me?
Rebecca: Oh, gee, Woody, I'm sorry. l- l'm really busy with this inventory.
Woody: Oh, yeah, sure, I understand. I'll just lose the part.
Rebecca: All right, Woody. But you have to promise to make it quick.
Woody: Thanks, Miss Howe. Hey, I hope you don't mind, it's a love scene.
Sam: Did you hear that? Love scene. [laughing] [Carla hits the rail with her bar tray] Ow! Love scene!
Carla: [to Hugh] Sometimes the little hamster falls asleep in the wheel.

Woody: Okay, if you could just sit here.
Rebecca: All right, Woody, but I'm expecting a beer distributor in five minutes.
Woody: No problem.
Carla: [enters] Sell it, make me believe it.
Rebecca: Carla?
Woody: Well, it really helps when you have an audience.
Carla: Is there gonna be any nudity?
Rebecca: Not unless you're planning something repugnant.

Rebecca: All right, so what are we doing here?
Woody: Okay. The scene is between a wayward, young, rodeo buff, Bo - that'd be me - and, uh, the sexy showgirl, Cherie. That's you, I guess.
Rebecca: Okay, uh... So where do we start?
Woody: Uh, right here before it says, "They kiss." ... Oh, oh, golly. When you kiss someone for serious, it's kind of scary, ain't it?
Rebecca: Yeah, it is.
Woody: Now I'm supposed to kiss you.

Sam: [enters] Sorry, l, uh, hope I'm not interrupting anything here.
Rebecca: What is it, Sam?
Sam: Uh... we're out of vermouth.
Rebecca: So order more.
Sam: Uh, is that okay?
Rebecca: Yes, if we're out of it.
Sam: We are. [gets between Woody and Rebecca]
Rebecca: Then order more.
Sam: Vermouth?
Rebecca: Yeah! Sam, would you excuse us, please?

Woody: Okay, where were we? Uh... Wait. [clears throat] Oh, oh, golly. When you kiss someone for serious, it's kind of scary, ain't it?
Rebecca: Yeah, it is.
Sam: [enters] Sorry, l, uh I wouldn't interrupt like this except it's important.
Rebecca: What is it, Sam?
Sam: I ordered the vermouth.
Woody: Sam, would you get out of here? We're right in the middle of a scene.
Sam: Oh, a play! Oh, I love good dramatic stuff. What is this, uh, Tennessee Ernie Ford?

Carla: Sam, get out. Come on.
Sam: All right, all right, all right.
Carla: Play fair.
Sam: All right, all right.
Rebecca: Play fair?
Carla: That's my opinion of the play so far, but with enough rehearsal, it might play great.

Woody: Okay, let's pick it up.
Rebecca: All right.
Woody: [clears throat] Oh. Oh, golly. When you kiss someone for serious, it's kind of scary, ain't it?
Rebecca: Yeah, it is.
Woody: Wait a minute. I just ordered two cases of vermouth yesterday! Sam's crazy. [walks out]