Sam: Sammy to the rescue!
Rebecca: Sam, get that mutt out of here!
Sam: What?
Rebecca: Sheridan's in the kitchen with Satan!
Sam: This is no time for folk singing.

Mr. Sheridan: I'd like to ask you a favor.
Rebecca: I see.
Mr. Sheridan: I'm going to New York on a business trip for a few days, and I'd like you to take care of my dog while I'm away.
Rebecca: Well, I'm sorry, Mr. Sheridan, but I have plans for the entire week, and I could not possibly break them. I hope you understand.
Mr. Sheridan: That's fine. I realize this is short notice. Thanks, anyway. [walks away]
Rebecca: [shakes] My plans could be changed. Please, sir, let let me do this for you.
Mr. Sheridan: Well, if you don't think it would be any trouble. Thank you, Miss Howe.
Rebecca: Oh, no, sir. Thank you for the opportunity of knowing your dog. God, I make myself sick!

Sam: Hey, there, Rebecca. How do you like living with Sheridan's pooch?
Rebecca: Sir Bronwyn the Gallant from Fairhaven Manor, better known as Buster, is fine. l, on the other hand, am a nervous wreck.
Alan: What's the matter, Rebecca?
Rebecca: Well, I knew I was going to have to take care of the dog, but I didn't know it was going to be in a place that was huge and kind of like a mausoleum and is stuck way out in the middle of the moors.
Cliff: There are no moors in Massachusetts.
Rebecca: I think they had them flown in or something.

Rebecca: Did anybody find the dog?
Cliff: Listen, little lady, we're not looking for Aunt Fannie's amethyst pendant here. This is a highly organized search party. We're gonna conduct this debriefing by the numbers. All right. Alpha Sector report.
Tim: Negative.
Cliff: Bravo Sector?
Alan: Negative.
Cliff: Charlie Sector?
Rebecca: Shut up, Cliff.

Sam: Let me see here. Rebecca Howe, all alone and scared in a big old house. Sounds to me like a job for Sammy's Security Company. We get in before the burglars do.
Carla: That's what I like about you, Sam. Your pants are always thinking.

Rebecca: I was doing pretty good till the lights went out. Then this house really started giving me the creeps.
Sam: Oh, well, hey don't worry. I've got some candles here.
Rebecca: You brought your own candles?
Sam: Well, yeah. This kind of thing happens in big, old, spooky houses a lot. I like to be prepared. Sammy carries whatever he needs.
Rebecca: Sam, did you come out here because you were concerned I was scared, or did you come out here to get me in the sack?
Sam: Hey, I came out here because I was concerned and scared that I'd never get you in the sack.
Rebecca: You know, Sam, I really am glad you're here. It makes me feel a lot better. But a man and a woman can be together in an evening without ending up rolling on the floor.
Sam: Well, I know that's true of some people, but, sweetheart, we're good-looking.

Lilith: Frasier, darling.
Frasier: Hello, there, Peanut Butter Cup. You know, you're late for lunch.
Lilith: Yes, I know. I'm sorry.
Frasier: Well, I'm sure you have a very good excuse.
Lilith: Well, actually, I do. I started having lunch at another restaurant, then remembered we had a date.
Frasier: Oh. Well, would you like to watch me eat?
Lilith: I wouldn't miss it.

Rebecca: Sit down here a minute. I want to tell you something.
Sam: Okay.
Rebecca: Now, believe this or not, even good-looking people can spend an evening together without having sex. Have you ever heard of conversation?
Sam: Yeah, I've heard of conversation. You know, contrary to what a lot of people think, I'm not that dumb. Here, come on. Try me. Sit down. Let's conversate.

Frasier: Sam, give me a double.
Carla: A little early for that, huh, Doc?
Frasier: Well, maybe you're right. Cancel that double. Make it a single. Oh, skip it altogether. No, on second thought, you know, make it a single, a little extra nip.
Sam: Frasier, what's your order?
Frasier: Cup of coffee.

Sam: You got troubles?
Frasier: Well, I've- I've just been invited to deliver a paper at the State Psychiatric Convention this week, and I've got a first-class case of the jitters.
Carla: You know, I have a a sure-fire way of keeping yourself calm. Picture your audience naked.
Frasier: Oh, thank you, Carla, for that old chestnut from Speech 101.
Carla: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I got a twist on it. Picture them naked and wearing black socks.
Frasier: Oh, Carla, that's ridiculous. I can't see that that would... [laughs as he looks at Carla]
Carla: I told you. It works. Okay, now try this angle. [Frasier laughs] Now shut up.
Frasier: Fine. You know, I do see your point though. That could do just the trick. Thank you, Carla.
Carla: Sure. Oh! Here comes a likely candidate. Try it out on her.
Rebecca: Hello, Dr. Crane.
Frasier: Miss Howe. [Frasier dries his forehead with his handkerchief] It doesn't work with everyone.