Barbara: I hope this isn't another assembly about a new e-mail system. I am not doing two-step verification. They can just hack me.
Melissa: They did hack you. Remember when your account sent out all that pornography?
Barbara: I do not.
Melissa: Okay.

Ava: Everyone settle down. I have a very important announcement to make in a short amount of time. My Postmates is around the corner. It's about damn time, José L.

Barbara: [laughs] Maybe I should do it. Oh. [British accent] 'Ello, dearie. Yes. You know, I'm interested in receiving some information about churnninggg Abbott charter. Yes. [normal voice] It's working. [Jamaican accent] Yeah, mon. I said go. You just want send me the information like that? Bye-bye.
Melissa: I'm not going to lie, Barb, that was pretty fricking good.
Ava: Barb, I had no idea you were this talented. You a damn genius.
Barbara: [Jamaican accent] We are going to need all the genius we can get, because the damn Legendary is coming for us. [normal voice] Legendary is coming for us.
Melissa: [clears throat] We got it.

Mr. Johnson: Legacy is important. That's why my picture's hanging on the Wall of Flame for eating 50 spicy chicken wings at Wing Bowl.
Janine: Wait a second. That is you up there? I always thought that was Michael Jordan.
Mr. Johnson: I get that a lot. The only difference between that MJ and this MJ is I can hit a curveball.

Janine: There's no need to feel bad. Look, even without what, you know, happened, something still wasn't quite clicking with Maurice. I mean, if it was, then I wouldn't have... kissed you, right?
Gregory: Right.
Janine: I'm going to go to Bone Town with Mo, and then I'm going to break up with him.
Gregory: Wow. Okay, well, that feels like too much information and also kind of cruel.
Janine: I know, but I figured if I got to do this, I might as well be full of meat and covered in sauce. [sighs]
Gregory: Oh, you mean the, um... The barbecue restaurant.
Janine: Yeah.
Gregory: Oh. Oh. Okay.

Barbara: Well, I guess this Silly Sock brigade is this generation's Rug Vermin.
Janine: Rugrats, and, um, wow.

Ava: You know, if y'all need to warm up, my apartment could use a fresh coat of Benjamin Moore.
Gabe: Uh, we only paint murals.
Ava: Okay, then paint a eggshell blizzard on my wall.

Melissa: Barb. Oh, my God. This e-mail I just got.
Barbara: No, not the porno again.
Melissa: No, I was looking into what Kristen Marie said about Legendary trying to turn Abbott charter, and she was right. There's an online petition a couple of our parents started to "make Abbott part of Legendary Charter."
Barbara: The audacity!

Barbara: We need to show Legendary that we mean business.
Melissa: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Barbara: There's power in numbers. I need to write my congregation for a letter of support.
Melissa: Or I could write a note to Draemond, the untraceable kind. Get my kids to cut out letters from a magazine. That'll be fun.

Jacob: Raheem.
Raheem: Mimimimimi. [class laughs]
Jacob: What was that, Raheem? I don't think that was even English. But as a polyglot, I am open to expression in any language.
Tiffany: Mr. C, you must be moss, 'cause clearly, you live under a rock.
Jacob: Well, I actually live over an ALDI, but, uh, wha... what do you... What are you talking about?