Dick Quote #1013
Quote from Dick in Two-Faced Dick
Mary: There you are. Where were you?
Dick: Oh, hey, Albright.
Mary: You were supposed to meet me for lunch!
Dick: I'm having a bad day. You wanna lay off?!
Mary: I was waiting at the Baguette for over an hour.
Dick: Yeah? Well, I was teaching that horrible class, and I couldn't take it, so I went to get some shoes, and I couldn't find anything I liked, [crying]... And then I came back here, and you started yelling at me!
Mary: I'm sorry, Dick, but I was waiting an hour.
Dick: I can't breathe. [sobs]
Mary: Are you okay?
Dick: You don't understand what I'm going through. I mean, just look at these!
Mary: I'm here to help.
Dick: You can't help. Nobody can help. I feel so trapped.
3rd Rock from the Sun Quotes
‘Two-Faced Dick’ Quotes
Quote from Tommy
Harry: Well, let's have a toast, shall we? To [voice quavers] new... Incoming message from the Big Giant Head. Your request has been approved. Your Lieutenant and High Commander will be restored to their previous Earth bodies immediately, and a small fee will appear on your next statement. Transmission ending in 3, 2, 1... [Harry, Dick and Sally sneeze]
Sally: Dick?
Dick: Sally?
Both: We're back!
Dick: Isn't that great, Tommy?
Sally: Oh, isn't that cool, Tommy?
Tommy: [squints] Tommy? I'm not Tommy.
Dick: Oh, my god!
Tommy: Ah, I'm just screwin' with you.
Quote from Sally
Dick: Oh, no where are my boobs?
Sally: I've got them!
Both: You're me!
Tommy: Dick?
Sally: What?
Harry & Tommy: Aah!
Dick: Oh, great.
Harry: What happened?
Tommy: The Big Giant Head just switched their bodies.
Dick: Wow.
Sally: Oh, my god! I'm gorgeous!
Quote from Harry
Harry: Tommy, am I a Virgo or a Capricorn?
Tommy: I don't know. What's your birthday?
Harry: Does it matter? Because this horoscope right [voice quavers] here... Incoming message from the Big Giant Head!
Tommy: Hey, Dick, get in here!
Harry: To ensure better customer service, this transmission may be monitored.
Dick: What is it?
Harry: The Big Giant Head has received your Lieutenant's request for gender reassignment.
Dick: What?
Tommy: Wait, Sally sent that thing off, like, three years ago.
Harry: The Big Giant Head hereby approves your request. For your convenience, your Lieutenant's body will be switched with that of your High Commander.
Dick: Lieutenant, you get in here!
Harry: Prepare to exchange forms in 3, 2, 1... [Harry, Dick and Sally sneeze]