‘Dream Team’
Season 5, Episode 22 - Aired April 9, 2009
As Michael and Pam attempt to get the "Michael Scott Paper Company" up and running, Michael tries to assemble his dream team. Meanwhile, the employees at Dunder Mufflin pretend to like soccer to impress their temporary boss, Charles Miner.
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, no! The new boss does not find Jim adorable! Oh! [smiles]
Quote from Pam
Pam: You know, Michael. When I feel overwhelmed -
Michael Scott: I'm not overwhelmed, Pam.
Pam: I know! No, I'm saying that when I feel overwhelmed, something I like to do is make a list. Make a list of things to do and then start with the easy stuff.
Michael Scott: Whatever calms you down.
Pam: Okay, first, work out. And, hey! Look! You did that. Check. [Michael doing leg lifts] Eat an enormous breakfast. Check.
Michael Scott: Don't patronize me, Pam.
Quote from Michael Scott
Michael Scott: Oh! Vikram! Best salesman I've ever met.
Pam: Okay.
Michael Scott: He worked at that telemarketing place.
Pam: We'll find him.
Michael Scott: Okay. Oh also, we have a meeting this afternoon with a potential investor.
Pam: Really?
Michael Scott: Yeah.
Pam: We have an investor already?
Michael Scott: Maybe. Barbara Keebis. She invests in local businesses. And I am putting together a little presentation for her.
Pam: Michael, that's fantastic.
Michael Scott: Yeah, I guess it's not so bad. Got a few things cookin'. [sits down with his legs spread open] Um...
Pam: Hey! We need to get you dressed!
Quote from Pam
Pam: I have doubts about this too. But when one person freaks out, sometimes it weirdly makes the other one calmer. That's one thing I've learned about relationships. I hate that I just used the word relationship.
Quote from Andy
Charles: I was actually in Germany for the 2006 World Cup Finals.
Andy: Ah, you bastard! That should've been me!
Charles: Yeah, I love the sport. I love the sport. All right, man.
Andy: Cool!
Quote from Michael Scott
Pam: Next on the list: open the mail.
Michael Scott: Oh. Wow. "Michael Scott Paper Company." Okay. Very official. "Dear Mr. Scott. Please be advised that it is in violation of your condominium agreement to conduct a business headquartered in your residence. The penalty, a forfeiture of residence."
Pam: No, okay. It's fine. It's fine. We're just gonna add "find office"...
Michael Scott: How are we gonna find an office? How can we pay for an office?
Pam: Next on the list: song parodies.
Michael Scott: Okay. Okay. "Achey Breaky Fart."
Pam: Great. Let's sing it in the car.
Michael Scott: No! No No. No. "My Stumps." Like "My Humps" but a guy with no legs.
Pam: Yeah.
Michael Scott: We can do this.
Pam: We can do this.
Quote from Jim
Jim: Yep, I used to play soccer in school. From second to fourth grade. I was on the orange team.
Quote from Ryan
Michael Scott: Would you like to come to work for the Michael Scott Paper Company?
Ryan: What size shoes are you guys?
Michael Scott: Uh, nine.
Ryan: What are those, a men's ten?
Pam: No.
Michael Scott: [Ryan grabs some shoes] Look what he's doing.
Pam: What is he doing?
Michael Scott: He's stealing them. Okay, okay.
Pam: Oh, my God.
Michael Scott: He's already paying for himself.
Quote from Jim
Charles: Aw, man, I can't wait to play with you.
Jim: Aw, it's gonna be the [quietly] worst.