Axl: [to the ants] All right! Come and get it! You guys want to eat pizza, you got to do it out here! You abused your privileges, getting into the nutter butters! You're outside ants now. [sighs] Oh. Hey. I'm just sitting here eating three-day-old pizza and talking to ants. See what you've been missing?
Devin: I saw Sue. She was with her a cappella group. And they sang a song to me about us.
Axl: Oh. Good. And here I was worried she'd make it worse.

Devin: Look, I'm sorry. I don't know. I guess I freaked out and I was kind of probably a jerk about it and didn't give you a chance to talk. So, you know, we should talk.
Axl: Uh, here's the thing. I don't know what Sue said to you, or apparently sang to you, but I didn't think what we were doing here was super serious. I'm not ready to get married. I mean, this is college. I'm not thinking ahead.
Devin: Yes, exactly. It's college. I mean, I don't want to get serious, either. This is supposed to be about you and me hanging out and having fun.
Axl: Exactly. That's all I ever wanted.
Devin: Really? So we're on the same page?
Axl: Completely. [chuckles] As we always have been. So, let's just go back to that with a new additional rule of not listening to anything Sue says again, ever. Hmm?
Devin: Cool.

Devin: Although... College is supposed to be the best time of our lives, and we wouldn't want to look back and think we didn't have all the fun we could have.
Axl: [sighs] What are you saying?
Devin: Well, um, I'm just saying... Do you ever think about all the hot girls on this campus?
Axl: Would I get in trouble if I said yes?
Devin: No! It's like, when are we ever gonna be presented with this many hot guys and girls our age ever again?
Axl: So, you're saying we should see other people?
Devin: Maybe. But we should also still see each other, too. Does that sound weird?
Axl: No, that sounds awesome. Are you sure you're not a guy?
Devin: I just want us to see each other, see other people, and definitely watch football together every Sunday.
Axl: I swear to God, if I didn't want to marry you, I would marry you.

Mike: Check it out. Remember Mark the field manager? He has to move, so he sold it for cheap. It's in great shape, too. [engine revs]
Frankie: Who are you? You look like a broom riding a motorcycle.
Mike: I don't care. I always wanted one of these things. [sighs] It's gonna be fun. Gonna get some rags and clean this baby up.
Frankie: Hold on. I-I don't get it. In 22, 23... whatever years of marriage, you have never once said anything about a motorcycle.
Mike: I don't know. I guess I just wanted something different.