TV Quotes

Frankie: Oh, is it hard? Is it too hard? I do it every day. And... silverware up, sharp knives down.
Axl: No. Oh! Daddy! Help me! She's a crazy person!
Mike: What's going on?
Frankie: He's 23 years old and living in our house... He should know how to load the dishwasher.
Mike: What do you mean? He's been loading the dishwasher for years.
Frankie: Yeah, and never correctly. He just throws everything in here like a big mess. That's why we have chipped bowls, our Tupperware is melted. The Spider-Man and Flintstone glasses rubbed against each other, so now we have no nice glasses for company. As long as he is living in this house, he's gonna learn to do things right. Don't you help him.
Axl: Ugh! [dishes clatter] My brain hurts. I need a break.
Frankie: Oh, fine. You can't take it, go cool off. And pick up your socks! For every stinky sock I find lying around there, I'm gonna leave a bra.

Frankie: What did you just do?
Brick: You heard her... Those threats were from Cindy! Those threats were from the lady I love! She clearly wants me back!
Frankie: No, no, no, no, no. We put too much work into getting this fish in the boat. Besides, Lilah is lovely and smart and normal and she seems to really like you.
Mike: And she eats cereal. We don't have to buy her shrimp.
Brick: But she's so much work. And with Cindy, things just come so naturally. You know Cindy... She's one in a million.
Mike: I'd go higher.
Brick: I blew it and broke up with her and thought I lost her forever, but now I have hope. I'm walking on air!

Mike: What's your problem?
Axl: You're still treating me like a kid! I don't need you to tell me how to do things anymore. You're telling me all the time. You're making me nuts. And I know I'm the younger lion and I'm challenging you and we're supposed to "lock horns"...
Mike: Lions don't have horns.
Axl: You don't need to tell me that lions don't have horns!
Mike: Well, you just said...
Axl: I know lions don't have horns. I just want to drive my own car.
Mike: Look, I'm older than you. I know you think you know best, but there's still a lot more you have to learn, and it's my job to teach you. It's been my job your whole life!
Axl: Okay, so, is that how it's gonna be, like, forever? 'Cause you'll always be older than me, and Grandpa Big Mike will always be older than you, and there's a guy in Jasper who's like 103. He'll always be older than all of us. Maybe he should drive us home.

Axl: Hello, summer! Goodbye, pants. I will see you in September.