Carl: So, how long have you girls been working?
Dorothy: That's an odd lead-off question, Carl. But actually I've been working about 30 years.
John: Boy, you must really know your business.
Blanche: Yes, Dorothy's a very experienced teacher. Everybody who's had her says she's great.
John: Let's get some drinks, go upstairs and have Dorothy teach us the three Rs. Reading, writing, running around the bed.

John: As enticing as the offer is, we really must pass. If you don't wanna party, there are younger girls that'll take our money.
Dorothy: Girls who'll take their money. You know what he thinks we are?
Rose: Waitresses?
Dorothy: No, Rose. Hookers.
Blanche: My God, that must mean everybody here is...
Police Officer: Everybody here is under arrest. This is a raid.

Blanche: Dorothy, what are we gonna do?
Dorothy: We'll simply have to explain that this is all a terrible mistake. Officer.
Police Officer: What can I do for the senior statesman of the group?
Dorothy: [chuckling] I'll let that pass because you have the upper hand. My friends and I are totally innocent.
Woman #1: I'm innocent too.
Woman #2: Me too.
Blanche: Quiet, you trash. Go on, Dorothy.

Blanche: I cannot believe it. Arrested. I've never been in jail in my entire life.
Woman #1: Relax, honey. With as many notches as you must have on your garter belt it was bound to happen.

Dorothy: Blanche. Blanche, did you really think you could get us out by flirting with that guard?
Blanche: Why yes, if he'd been a man.
Rose: Oh, sure. It's always a man with you, isn't it, Blanche? Men and sex, sex and men.
Woman: Hey, there's nothing wrong with being career-oriented!
Blanche: It's your overactive sex drive that got us into this mess. Who picks a hotel because of all the men in the lobby?
[All the other jailed women raise their hands]

Blanche: Will you just get off my back, Nylund? Do you think I'm happy about being arrested? Do you think I'm happy about missing Burt Reynolds? Do you think I'm happy about being locked up with all this common gutter trash?
Woman: What did you just say?
Blanche: What cute earrings.
Woman: Nobody calls me names. Come on, let's go. I'll let you have the first punch.
Blanche: Punch? Heavens.

Dorothy: Blanche. Rose, we're going to the other end of the cell. Don't cross this line.

Blanche: Well, ladies, we're gonna see Burt after all. I thought these beautiful tickets were gonna go to waste.
Sophia: So which one of you isn't going?
Blanche: Well, I'm the one who won the tickets.
Dorothy: Yeah, well my Mom's the one who's bailing us out.
Rose: I lost Butter Queen. Haven't I suffered enough?
Dorothy: We'll draw straws.
Blanche: No.
Dorothy: We'll flip a coin.
Rose: No.
Blanche: Sophia, we had this all settled. Now try and be understanding.
Sophia: Understanding? I came down here to bail you out and you're still not letting me go?
Dorothy: Ma, stop complaining and get us out of here.
Police Officer: Where are your roommates, Mrs. Petrillo?
Sophia: They're not here.
Dorothy: Ma!
Sophia: Don't "Ma" me, you cheap floozy.
Dorothy: Ma! Ma, you would do this to your own flesh and blood?
Sophia: You'll get over it, Dorothy. And if you don't, who cares? I'm on my way to see Burt Reynolds.

Rose: Meg. Come in.
Meg: I can't, my taxi's waiting. I just wanted to stop by and say thank you.
Rose: For what?
Meg: For convincing me to go back home. I figured I'd give it another try.
Rose: Oh, that's great. What was it I said?
Meg: Nothing. I just decided I didn't want to be as old as you are and still be in the business.
Rose: Well, good luck.