Rose: I'm fine, don't worry about me. It's all those other people.
Blanche: Was there some kind of accident? No, don't tell me, if I get upset I'll eat.
Dorothy: What happened, Rose?
Rose: They closed the center.
Blanche: Not your Grief Counseling Center?
Dorothy: No, the Kennedy Space Center. She wanted to be the first Lutheran on the moon.

Blanche: Rose, you're out of a job!
Rose: Well, I can't worry about that now.
Dorothy: Well, sure you can, honey. I'll help you: food, clothing, shelter.
Rose: Oh come on, it's not that serious.
Dorothy: Yes, it could be. Rose, you and I are in the same boat. If we miss a couple of paychecks, we are in big trouble.
Blanche: Thank God I had the foresight to marry money.
Dorothy: Tramp!

Rose: Dorothy, my main concern is making sure those miserable people can find other sources of help. Then I'll get a job. I'm dependable, friendly, loyal, eager.
Dorothy: That's great. If she learns to catch a Frisbee in her teeth, she can get work as a golden retriever.

Rose: Don't worry, will you? I will get a job. There's always a job for people who aren't afraid of hard work. That's what my father used to say.
Dorothy: Yeah, he was talking about milking cows in Minnesota!

Rose: Mr. Viner's depressed. Mrs. Gibson's despondent. Mr. Duvalier's been deported. Why, oh, why, can't grief take a holiday?
Dorothy: Oh, it does, Rose, it does. Eventually, it comes to Miami like everyone else.

Dorothy: Oh, my God. I don't believe it! Barry Glick is in town. Oh, I haven't seen him since high school. Barry Glick! Ma, Ma, look, look, Barry Glick! Oh boy, did I have the hots for him! He says he wants to get together next week!
Sophia: You're gonna see him?
Dorothy: See him? If he's within 50 pounds of where he used to be, I'm going to marry him!

Blanche: I hate phone calls in the middle of the night. Now I'll never get back to sleep. I'm as jumpy as a virgin at a prison rodeo.
Dorothy: Boy, that's pretty jumpy.

Dorothy: Oh, Rose. Rose, honey, now why didn't you tell us what was going on?
Rose: Because you can't help me find a job. Because nobody or nothing can make me young again.
Dorothy: Oh, all right, Rose, so your life isn't the same as it used to be. The rules have changed, but it's happened before, hasn't it? I mean, what did you do after Charlie died?
Rose: Buried him.
Dorothy: I mean, what did you do the next day when you had to start putting your life together?
Rose: I couldn't do it. I'd been a housewife for 32 years. I totally depended on Charlie.
Dorothy: Yeah, but the point is, eventually you did what you had to do. You took care of yourself. Sweetheart, you're now in exactly the same position.
Rose: Not exactly. I'm five years older and nobody wants me around.
Blanche: Oh, honey, we want you around. We just can't afford to pay you.

Dorothy: I can't sleep, either. Why don't I make us all some warm milk? After I drink milk, I go right to sleep.
Blanche: I can think of something else after which I go right to sleep. Huh, Dorothy?
Dorothy: During.

Rose: Girls, we can't drink plain milk.
Blanche: Why not?
Rose: It's disgusting. If we're gonna have milk, we need cookies.
Blanche: Hell, if I'm gonna have cookies, I'm gonna have cheesecake.
Rose: Is there cheesecake?
Blanche: Chocolate cheesecake.
Dorothy: You bought chocolate cheesecake?
Blanche: Just for an emergency.
Dorothy: What kind of emergency, nuclear war?
Blanche: Depression.