Blanche: [on the phone] Well, if you're as friendly as your skies are, I'd sure love to get together sometime. All right. Bye. [hangs up] I have a flight to Atlanta first thing tomorrow morning.

Blanche: Ketchup to go on my lima beans.
Dorothy: Why?
Blanche: Oh, he sometimes ate 'em that way. He'd make up stories about how that's the way the kings and queens of Europe ate 'em. He always made it sound so special. He always made everything sound so damned special. Oh, God, why didn't I go when he called? Why didn't I go?

Dorothy: Anybody want anything else?
Blanche: Oh, not me, thank you. I'm too upset to eat. I may never eat again.
Virginia: Blanche. Oh, you're right, I should keep up my strength. Dorothy, something with frosting.

Blanche: Come here, sister, and give me a big hug.
Virginia: It's just a little late to be sharing a beautiful moment, don't you think? Where were you, Blanche? He wanted you.
Blanche: He did not sound that sick on the phone. Besides, I told him I'd be here to see him soon. And don't you get so righteous with me. There were plenty of times when you weren't there for him.
Virginia: What are you talking about?
Blanche: Always trying to make me out to be the inconsiderate one. I remember when you were 16 and didn't come home for Father's Day.
Virginia: I was away at school.
Blanche: Oh, yes. The Good Samaritan Academy for the Knocked-Up. Two, four, six, eight, all us girls are three months late. That was wonderful for him.

Virginia: Didn't hurt him half as much as when you were 18, went off to Europe with that guy, Phil.
Blanche: It was Philippe. And Big Daddy understood how romantic it was to go live in Copenhagen with a tortured painter.
Virginia: He painted houses, Blanche. You are the one who has never been here for the family. You.
Blanche: I have always been here for this family, and how dare you say otherwise.
Virginia: Everything you do is for Blanche. To tell you the truth, I am surprised that you even made it to the funeral at all.
Blanche: Maybe you would have been happier if I hadn't.
Virginia: Maybe not happier. But at least this family would be able to grieve for Big Daddy without wondering what is in it for Blanche.
Blanche: Oh, fine. Hey, you don't have a thing to worry about. You won't have to think about Blanche. Because if you're gonna be at that funeral I refuse to go.

Sophia: OK, I want to go over a few of the house rules. You share the bathroom with the people staying in Dorothy's room. I believe the people across the street are out of town so you can use their pool. They're friends of ours, so try and pick up after yourselves.

Sophia: What do you want me to do? Kick them out? There's not a room in town. These people come from a small town in Iowa, much like St. Olaf.
Rose: Really?
Sophia: I don't lie about stuff like this, Rose. The good people in that town saved and sacrificed so that Peter and Maddy could have one weekend of fun before his operation.
Rose: Well, he looks fine.
Sophia: Oh, tell him that. Look, call me crazy. I don't see anything wrong with giving a veteran his last wish, and making some dough.
Rose: Well, I guess they can stay.
Sophia: Thank you, Rose. Here, take this out there, make sure they pay.
Rose: Oh, I don't think it's right to charge them.
Sophia: Neither do I, but he hates pity.
Rose: I understand. [exits]
Sophia: What a tool.

Dorothy: Listen, Blanche, I think you have to go to the funeral. You wanted to be there for him, be there for him now. Don't let this argument with Virginia stand in your way. Blanche, you're never gonna feel complete until you get to say goodbye.
Blanche: You don't understand, Dorothy. If I go to that funeral, he's dead.
Dorothy: Blanche, he is.

All: [singing] The first marine he found the bean, parlez-vous? The second marine, he cooked the bean, parlez-vous? The third marine, he ate the bean, rolled over the submarine Inky-dinky parlez-vous?
Sophia: Oh, nice people.
Rose: Sophia, you didn't say anything about parties in the house.
Sophia: Oh, so Peter and Maddy are having a few friends over. We're making a bundle. Boy, I wish we had thought of putting in a pay toilet.

Howard: Did you call about buying the Citrus Festival plate?
Rose: Yes, I did.
Sophia: Oh, Rose. You're beautiful.
Rose: How much do you want for it?
Howard: Well, they're pretty rare. There's only five of these. I'd say $2000.
Sophia: $2000 a plate? What is this? A Republican fundraiser?