Beverly Quote #1708

Quote from Beverly in Two-Timing Goldbergs

Adam: And these are for Carmen.
Beverly: Really? You're still seeing that girl, huh?
Adam: For the millionth time, yes.
Beverly: So what's it gonna be this time? A standard Say Anything boombox followed by a trellis climb for a PG-rated smooch?
Adam: You don't know all my moves! But basically, yeah. It's our "one month-iversary."
Beverly: Month-iversary?!
Adam: Plus I rented a tux, and I'm putting the final touches on a patented Adam Goldberg mixtape! Why are you crying?
Beverly: I just remember when you were so teeny and innocent and didn't like strange local women.
Adam: I'm taking this upstairs.
Beverly: [holds up boombox] But I love you! I've always loved you! Okay, how do you turn this thing on from here?


 ‘Two-Timing Goldbergs’ Quotes

Quote from Geoff

Geoff: So, your incredibly specific tale of infidelity got me thinking. You're not the only one who can spin a convincing yarn about a torrid dalliance.
Erica: Alright. Get whatever this is out of your system.
Geoff: I'm just saying, I, too, know an out-of-the-way motel where the touching of non-wives may occur.
Erica: Oh, no. I feel super threatened.
Geoff: That's right. I would do some touching.
Erica: Could you possibly be more specific?
Geoff: Happily. Know that said touching would be the touching of an unfamiliar female person...
Erica: Uh-huh.
Geoff: And perhaps, if her hands are clean, underneath this rugby shirt.
Erica: You're incredibly bad at this.
Geoff: Please never leave me.

Quote from Beverly

Adam: So, what are we working with? Lay it on me. Who's lining up for a dose of Vitamin A?
Beverly: Lotta interest, um, but I think this might not be dating season.
Adam: Dating season?
Beverly: You know how many ladies like to go away on vacation at the end of February.
Adam: Oh, my God. Nobody wanted to go out with me, did they?
Beverly: You're a bit of a tough sell. You put off going to college, you're working part-time in a diner, you're living at home, and it does not sweeten the pot that you're currently seeing someone else in a non-exclusive sitch. Now, the only one that might be a possibility is Essie, but she said she'd have to think on it.
Adam: This is a nightmare!
Beverly: It's tearing me apart that the world can't see my boy for the hot property he is, even though, in this moment, to all appearances, it seems like you're a loser.
Adam: Thank you?

Quote from Geoff

Geoff: Hanky-panky!
Erica: What?
Geoff: An illicit entanglement is brewing between Barry and Lainey!
Erica: No way. I know Lainey, and she would never make that mistake again. For the third time.
Geoff: I don't know, whenever Lainey's around, Barry gets all weird.
Erica: He's Barry. Weird is his natural state. Plus, he's over Lainey.
Geoff: I just don't see Barry ever fully moving on.
Erica: Where is all this coming from?
Geoff: Okay, one, Barry is on record saying that jean shorts are the uniform of "half-men." Two, Barry would never go to Matt Bradley for advice about anything, and three, Matt Bradley is out of town!
Erica: Even if Barry was dumb enough to go back down that road, there is no way that Lainey would. If she was even thinking about it, she'd tell me. I'm her best friend!
Geoff: Maybe. But there are two words she hasn't shared with you... hanky-panky.