Kelso Quote #400
Quote from Kelso in Eric's False Alarm
Kelso: Stay away from my girlfriend!
Jackie: Michael, what are you doing?
Kelso: Well, I can be at the mall now, 'cause I got business. Train business.
Jackie: You have lost your mind!
Kelso: Yep, and I don't miss it!
Jackie: Michael, look at you, riding around on a kiddie train so you can spy on me. I mean, do you not see how crazy this is?
Kelso: Well, yeah. But I- I don't know what to do. I mean, I'm a mess. I can't sleep, I can't eat. Well, I can eat. And then when I eat, I get kind of sleepy. But I am really upset.
Jackie: Look, if we're ever gonna get past this, you have to forget about that stupid little kiss and just try- try to remember that we love each other.
Kelso: I know.
Jackie: So can we please, please just finally move on?
Kelso: I wanna say yes, but it's like we're on this track and we keep going around in circles like some kind of... some kind of... I don't know. I lost my train of thought.
That '70s Show Quotes
‘Eric's False Alarm’ Quotes
Quote from Bob
Kitty: Okay, Bob, I think the problem is that Joanne thinks you're moving just a little too fast.
Bob: That's just who I am. I do everything fast. I run fast. I drive fast. I eat fast.
Kitty: Okay, what happens when you eat fast?
Bob: I get gassy.
Kitty: Right. Okay, well, a relationship works the same way. When it grows too fast, it... it gets gassy, too. And-And- And then the bad thing happens and people leave the room.
Bob: Wow. A lot of people have told me to slow down, but nobody ever said it in a way that spoke to me.
Quote from Fez
Eric: Oh. Hey, guess what, fellas? Turns out I still have feelings for Donna. Yeah. Deep feelings. Warm feelings.
Tingly-in-the-pants feelings. And I can't do anything about it, because she has those feelings for someone else.
Kelso: I think that admitting that you still love Donna is an important step because it reopens the door for this. [singsong] Eric loves Donna! Eric loves Donna!
Eric: Look, you guys, I don't love her. I just think that if she's not with me the fairest thing for everyone is if she's alone and unhappy.
Kelso: No! That is a bad plan, man. 'Cause if you leave a chick alone, the next thing you know she's licking the roof of some other guy's mouth. Like the cheese guy. I hate that guy.
Fez: But you love his cheese. See, this is just like a Southern tragedy. Tennessee Williams, but with cheese. [off Hyde's look] I'm taking advanced English.
Quote from Kelso
Hyde: I just think we all need to zip it. [to Fez] Especially you.
Fez: Hey, I can keep a secret. I didn't tell Kelso you took five bucks from his wallet.
Kelso: Hyde!
Jackie: None of you guys can keep a secret.
Kelso: Well, you sure can, especially when it's about you kissing other guys.
Jackie: Michael, it was one guy from work, and I told you I'm sorry. God, how long are you gonna keep throwing that in my face?
Kelso: Well, how long are you gonna keep throwing your face in other guys' faces? Wow. That was clever. I think I won that! Yeah!