Fez Quote #156

Quote from Fez in Jackie Moves On

Fez: [inner monologue] Okay, Fez. Asking Jackie out is a big opportunity for you. And if she says no, don't cry. Just be witty and polite. Stick to the script. And most importantly, speak slowly and enunciate. [dials phone]
Jackie: [answers phone] Hello.
Fez: "Hello, Jackie, how are you doing today? I am fine. Nice weather lately, huh? Would you like to go out to dinner with me tonight?"
Jackie: Okay. Wait, who is this?
Fez: It's me, Fez.
Jackie: Oh. Okay.
Fez: I just thought that since you and Kelso are no longer dating...
Jackie: How is Michael doing?
Fez: Uh, fine, I guess. Actually, he seems dumber.
Jackie: Well, you know what, that's great. 'Cause I'm doing fine, too. Just fine.
Fez: Well, if you are fine, then I'm dandy. You... You and me, fine and dandy. Did you hang up?
Jackie: No.
Fez: Pick you up at 8:00?
Jackie: Fine.
Fez: Dandy.

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 ‘Jackie Moves On’ Quotes

Quote from Eric

Eric: Well, I know some pretty horrible things about you, too, little lady. Fellas... Laurie here waxes her lips, legs, eyebrows, toes, and shoulder blades.
Laurie: In the fifth grade, Eric sent away for the Charles Atlas kit 'cause a girl kicked sand in his face.
Eric: You stuffed in high school.
Laurie: So did you.
Eric: Last year, Laurie used all of her birthday money to buy a back massager. Which isn't fooling anyone, by the way.
Laurie: Well... That's not as bad as when I walked in on you in bed with your Dorothy Hamill poster, and you were all...
Eric: Laurie was born with a tail! [Fez gasps]
Hyde: What?
Eric: Yeah, Laurie was born with a tail.
Laurie: I hate you! [runs out]
Eric: It's true.

Quote from Hyde

Hyde: Boy, Laurie, you really liked that hot dog. You didn't even chew it.
Laurie: Oh, hey, Hyde, Father's Day is coming up. Shouldn't you practice saying "Hi, are you my daddy?"
Hyde: Oh, by the way, Laurie, the surgeon general called. He wanted you to stop hoarding all the penicillin.
Laurie: You know, when you're in prison, your bad table manners will probably just be a turn-on for some guy named Tank.
Hyde: Oh, well, maybe when you're there for a conjugal visit, you can ask him to take it easy on me.
Laurie: Oh, yeah, well... Nice hair.

Quote from Kelso

Kelso: Oh, hey, you guys, guess what part of my body I nicknamed Pink Floyd?
Donna: Shut up.
Kelso: Well, Jackie thought it was cute.