Glenn Quote #20
Quote from Glenn in Shots and Salsa
Glenn: Before we open, I need a volunteer to hand out samples of the new Cloud 9 brand salsa, Senor Cloud.
Mateo: Yes, right here. I'll do it.
Glenn: Yes, perfect, and I don't mean just because you're Mexican.
Mateo: I'm actually Filipino.
Glenn: Okay, let's consider all our options. Um, Amy, I've got a feeling this is right up your alley.
Amy: Because I'm Latina?
Glenn: No, it has nothing to do with race. You just have a certain natural spiciness.
Amy: [chuckles] No.
Glenn: Okay, you know, fine, I'll just, uh, pick someone at random. Eeny, meeny, miney, mo. Jesus saved us long ago. Don't believe me, what a shame. Judgment day you'll be in flames. [points at Carmen]
Amy: The other Latina?
Glenn: What?
Jonah: I could do it.
Dina: That'd be hilarious. You should dress like a matador.
Carmen: Honestly, it's fine. It beats a day of dressing room duty.
Glenn: Thank you. Think fast! Mexico hat!
Superstore Quotes
‘Shots and Salsa’ Quotes
Quote from Dina
Amy: Try a free sample of our new salsa, sir? [man walks by] It's good.
Dina: Nope, absolutely not. People are not gonna buy salsa from you unless they think it's authentic. You got to add some "indigenous-ness." You know? Just put a little Vergara on it. [as Sofia Vergara] You want to buy some salsa? Is for charity! Oh, Jay, thank you for my necklace!
Amy: No, stop it. I'm not going to put on a fake accent and I'm not gonna make up fake charities.
Dina: The charity is real. Yeah, check it out. All the proceeds go to the La Benevolencia Orphanage in Los Nogales, Mexico. There's a different child on every jar. I think it's a collect 'em all situation.
Amy: Well, fine, that's great. That's a very worthy cause, but I think my dignity is worth a little bit more than a few bucks for charity.
Dina: Ah, these are all Juan S's. I've already got that one. Oh, score, Luisa M.! She was born without knees, but she loves to dance. Must be mostly upper body stuff.
Quote from Jonah
Jonah: You know, it's funny that you mention walls. Because that summer that I spent doing Habitat for Humanity, I was literally building... [both groan] What?
Amy: You know, you find ways to work that into conversation a lot.
Garrett: Mm-hmm.
Amy: I try not to say words like "hammer" or "roof" when I'm around you.
Garrett: One time you got there from Hugh Laurie.
Jonah: Look, my point is, there are people who do nothing and there are people who do something, and I am one of those people.
Amy: Hmm.
Jonah: The... the something group.
Quote from Garrett
Garrett: [over PA] Attention, Cloud 9 shoppers, be sure to stop by grocery for a free sample of Senor Cloud salsa. And in pharmacy, get yourself a flu shot, available in medium, mild, ay-yi-yi picante, and I'm almost positive that was written down wrong.