‘Forced Hire’
Season 5, Episode 3 - Aired October 10, 2019
Dina is apoplectic when her nemesis, Colleen from the Bel-Ridge branch, starts work at the store. Meanwhile, Jonah needs Marcus's help to get the warehouse guys to join the union.
Quote from Dina
Dina: Well, guess what I just heard from my dear friend Colleen? You two are going out.
Garrett: Well, it's true. I'm going out with Colleen.
Dina: [wheezes]
Amy: Oh man, Garrett. That is... messed up. You're gonna go out with Colleen to get her to fall in love with you just so you can break her heart?
Dina: Wait... what are you talking about?
Garrett: Yeah. Yes, Amy, that's what I'm doing. I just felt so bad for what I did to your birds that I didn't think getting Colleen to quit was good enough.
Dina: Wait, so all of this is just... a long con?
Garrett: Oh, yeah.
Dina: I can't believe I fell for this. Of course you're not interested in Colleen. No one is. This is really good. All right, we gotta make sure you win her over.
Garrett: Okay...
Dina: And forget tacos. You need to woo this woman. I'll make a reservation somewhere romantic and I'll give them my credit card. I mean, it's the least I can do since you're doing this for me.
Garrett: Oh, yeah, the least you could do.
Dina: Can't believe you.
Quote from Dina
Dina: Have fun, you two. Get dessert. Order a nice bottle of wine. Splurge! [Garrett and Colleen exit]
Amy: So, great news. Crestwood's assistant manager had a pallet dropped on her. I mean, it's bad. She's gonna be fine. She's getting a ton of money. But I begged them to take Colleen, and they said yes.
Dina: Wait, so Colleen's out of the store and Garrett's gonna break her heart?
Amy: Mm-hmm.
Dina: This day just keeps getting better and better.
Quote from Jonah
Jonah: Got the warehouse guys back on board without Marcus's help.
Amy: Oh, good.
Jonah: Yep, yep. It turns out at the end of the day, people just wanna connect on a human level, you know?
Amy: Uh-huh. Uh, what's all over your shirt?
Jonah: That is... a gallon of ranch. I had to chug a gallon of ranch. Is that, uh...
Dina: There it is.
Amy: A bag of meth.
Jonah: Ah.