Jerry: What are you doing? We're going out to dinner in ten minutes.
George: I never assisted in a birth before. It's really quite disgusting.
Jerry: What did she name the kid?
George: You wouldn't believe it. Rasputin.

George: So how was it?
Kramer: George, I would like to thank you for the greatest four days I ever spent in my life. They were shooting the Sports Illustrated swim suit issue right in the hotel pool.
Jerry: Whoa. [hits George]
Kramer: Not only that, but at the hotel they opened up this area on the beach for nude bathing and all of the Sports Illustrated models went down there.
Jerry: Wow! [hits George]
Kramer: I was on the next blanket from Elle McPherson.
Jerry: Oh! [hits George]
Kramer: We played Backgammon in the nude.
Jerry: Oh! [hits George]
Kramer: She's a sweet kid.
Jerry: Nude backgammon with swimsuit models! [hits George]
Kramer: Oh, you know what? The second day I was there, I stepped on a jellyfish. Now, it kind of stung my foot. That's probably what Rula was trying to warn you about.
George: Yeah, you gotta watch for the jellyfish.

Kramer: Hey, where you going?
Jerry: We're taking Elaine to dinner. She's got to start the fast again. Um, you want to go?
Kramer: Um, I'd like to but a bunch of us from the islands, we'll be getting together.
George: Elle McPherson going to be there?
Kramer: Oh, I got to call her back.

Gina: You know why he did this? Because I told him it was over. I did not want to see him anymore.
Jerry: Really? It's over?
Gina: I could not stand it another minute. Yesterday, he turned over a man's hot dog stand because he thought the man was looking at me. And then after he saw you in the hall. Ach, he was crazy with jealousy.
Jerry: Oh boy, did he say anything about me?
Gina: He does not like you. And all indications are he does not like Drake's Coffee Cake.
Jerry: He said that?
Gina: He was screaming about it all night. How it's too sweet and it falls apart when you eat it.

Jerry: I'm sorry if I caused any trouble. I was just being friendly.
Gina: I wasn't.
Jerry: You weren't?
Gina: No, I have thought about you many times. Have you thought about me?
Jerry: Of course.
Gina: Tell me everything.
Jerry: Are you sure he can't hear anything? [right up in the comatose guy's face] Martin! Martin!
Gina: I wish he was not in a coma. I wish he was dead. I wish I could pull the plug out from him.
Jerry: I, would, I would wait on that. I know how you feel, but juries today, you never know how they're going to look at a thing like this.

Gina: I saw you looking at your watch. You want to leave? Go ahead.
Jerry: No, I just wanted to see what time it was.
Gina: Are you afraid of him?
Jerry: No.
Gina: Then kiss me.
Jerry: Here?
Gina: Yes, right here.
Jerry: Is this the proper venue?
Gina: You don't want to?
Jerry: No, no, I want to. I, I very much want to. I, I desire to. I, I pine to.
Gina: Then kiss me right in front of him.
Jerry: I can't. What if he wakes up?
Gina: A man is lying here unconscious and you're afraid of him? What kind of a man are you?
Jerry: A man who respects a good coma. If it was one of those in and out comas, maybe. But when a guy's got a coma going like this, you don't want to mess with it.

Jerry: You know, I don't get that whole suicide machine. There's no tall buildings where these people live? They can't wrap their lips around a revolver like a normal person?

Gina: I do not like your toothbrush. There are no bristles.
Jerry: You can say what you want about me but I'll be damned if I'm going to stand here while you insult my toothbrush.
Gina: It is too small for someone with such a big mouth. [kisses Jerry] Let me ask you. What will you do if Martin wakes up? Run away like a mouse?
Jerry: No, more like the Three Stooges at the end of every movie.

Gina: Who are these Stooges you speak of?
Jerry: They're a comedy team.
Gina: Tell me about them. Everything.
Jerry: Well, they're three kind of funny looking guys and they hit each other a lot.
Gina: You will show me The Stooges?
Jerry: I will show you The Stooges.
Gina: When?
Jerry: Well, I don't really know where The Stooges are right now but if I locate them you will be the first to know.

Gina: Come, you walk me to a cab.
Jerry: Well, uh, I uh, I don't want you to get upset or anything but uh, with Martin and all, well maybe it's not such a good idea for us to be seen together in the building, because, you know, he had a lot of friends here.
Gina: You're still afraid. You are not a man.
Jerry: Well, then what are all those ties and sport jackets doing in my closet?