George: Hey, why are all those people milling around my car?
Kramer: I don't know.
Jerry: Maybe they're admiring your spot.
Kramer: They're looking up.
George: Hey, there's a guy up on the roof.
Kramer: Whoa. That's the guy I told where the elevator was.
George: Oh, God, I hope he doesn't jump... [Elaine gasps] Oh, my God! My car! My car!

Elaine: A mohel? What the hell is a mohel?
Jerry: A mohel is the person that performs a circumcision.
Elaine: Well, where am I gonna find a mohel? [thumbing through the Yellow Pages] Motels, models... How do you find a mohel?
Jerry: Oh, finding a mohel's easy. Any idiot can find a mohel. I have to hold the baby while they do it. That's a tough job. How would you like that?

George: Well, I got the estimate. It's going to cost more to repair the roof than the car is worth. So I'm going over and seeing that hospital administrator today. Someone is gonna pay for this, and it's not gonna be me!
Jerry: Oh, you're screwed.
George: I know. Swan dives from 20 floors up, lands right on top. What, do I got a bull's-eye up there? He couldn't move over two feet, huh? Land on the sidewalk, it's city property.

Elaine: Well, I have to interview a mohel.
Jerry: How about our little Elaine, huh? Attended the finest schools on the eastern seaboard.... equestrian competitions, debutante balls. Look at her now. Interviewing mohels.

Elaine: That's just about enough.
Jerry: This doesn't interest you?
Elaine: Oh, no, it's fascinating... but could you do me a favor? Could you tape the rest of the "pig-men and the
women who love them" discussion? And I'll listen to it the next time I'm here. I gotta go find a mohel.
Kramer: You know, you should call that off, Elaine. It's a barbaric ritual.
Elaine: Well, perhaps one day when the pig-men roam free, it will be stopped, Kramer. Until then, off with their heads.

George: Kramer, isn't it a question of hygiene?
Kramer: It's a myth. Besides, it makes sex more pleasurable.
George: Yeah. So how does that help me?

Jerry: Hey, George, you ever see one?
George: Yeah, my roommate in college.
Jerry: Yeah, what did you think?
George: I got used to it.

Jerry: Where's the mohel?
Elaine: He'll be here.
Jerry: He's late already.
Elaine: Relax. You'd think you were getting whacked.

George: So, you been to a bris before?
Woman: No.
George: I've been to a few of them. If you start to get woozy later, which is quite common, stay close to me. I'll get you through it.
Woman: I'm a cardiologist. I think I'll manage.

George: Hey, look at that. Boy, are you lucky! Another great spot in front of the hospital. In an emergency yet! How lucky are you, huh? Is that unbelievable? How unbelievable is that, huh? Come on, give it to me. Give it to me.