Carla Quote #11
Quote from Carla in My Two Dads
Carla: Come on, I wanna show you something.
Turk: Wait. It's about the pen. I thought a really nice one would be a great gift, and I see a great one in the Lost and Found Box.
Carla: There is no Lost and Found Box. There's an Ass Box...
Turk: Yeah, there is.
Carla: Ugh. And to think you were this close to getting everything you wanted. I assume this is what you wanted.
Turk: Yes.
Carla: And yet you come home and tell me that your thoughtful token of love wasn't a token of love at all. It was an ass pen. You come home and tell me this all because being open and honest is more important to you than having sex with me? [goes into the bedroom] Are you coming or what?
Turk: Hell, yeah. [puts Rowdy in the living room] Stay, Rowdy, stay.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Two Dads’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Cox
Dr. Cox: So you're the one who told Kelso that Mr. Martinez was dead? That's terrific work.
J.D.: [v.o.] Looks like word gets around.
Dr. Cox: What in the name of "Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret" were you thinking?
J.D.: Well, I'm new here but I'm relatively certain that invasive vascular procedures have a low success rate on dead people.
Dr. Cox: That TIPS procedure was for Mrs. Blitt down in 103. You see, she doesn't have insurance. Mr. Martinez, on the other hand, had great insurance. Should I talk slower or get a nurse who speaks fluent Moron?
J.D.: You don't have to be, like, mean about it.
Dr. Cox: Well, geez, Newbie. Just what in the hell do you want from me?
[fantasy: home movie of J.D. and Dr. Cox playing catch]
Dr. Cox: I don't know if they taught you this in the land of fairies and puppy-dog tails where you obviously, if not grew up, then at least spent most of your summers, but you're in the real world now, okay?
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: [v.o.] I know it sounds melodramatic, but as I watched the two of them, they weren't battling for patients or for insurance, but for my soul.
Dr. Cox: She needed the TIPS...
Dr. Kelso: I've got you this time. I can taste it!
J.D.: [v.o.] It's an old story, really. Good versus bad. Right versus wrong. The dark side versus the light.
[fantasy: Dr. Kelso as Darth Vader and Dr. Cox as Obi-Wan Kenobi battle as the others, also in Star Wars costumes, watch:]
Dr. Kelso: I've been waiting for this moment all my life.
Turk: Easy, Chewie.
Janitor: [groans]
Dr. Kelso: I'll teach you to respect this institution.
Dr. Cox: I hope you learn from this.
J.D.: No!
Quote from Nurse Roberts
Turk: Yo, Elliot, check out these ass slides.
Elliot: Oh, my God. How does that stuff even get up there?
[montage:]
Man: I fell on it.
Woman: I fell on it.
Man: I fell on it.
Man: I was bored.
[present:]
Nurse Roberts: The doctors in the ER have a box where they keep all this junk.
Turk: Is that, like, next to the Lost and Found Box?
Nurse Roberts: Lost and Found box? There's no Lost and Found Box. There's an Ass Box.