Turk Quote #614
Elliot: Hey, Dr. Cox, I heard you were hiring Dr. Turk as the new Chief of Surgery.
Turk: Told her the good news.
Dr. Cox: It's not happening. I have tried to communicate that message to you every single way I know how but you won't hear it. Honestly, the only option I have left is to concentrate really hard and see if I can shoot my actual message right into your big bald head. [groans]
Turk: I know you don't want to give me the job.
Dr. Cox: My god. It worked. This is a terrific day for science.
Turk: Time to call in the closer.
Carla: A word.
Dr. Cox: Why do you always have your wife fight your battles for you?
Turk: I do. Get him, woman.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Cuz’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Barista: Folks, I'm sorry but we have to close. Our pastry maker was just admitted to the hospital with a highly contagious intestinal virus.
Dr. Kelso: [finishing his fifth muffin] What the hell. I'm already in it.
[later:]
Dr. Kelso: Hi, I need to check myself in.
Nurse: For what?
Dr. Kelso: [vomits] For that.
Quote from Dr. Cox
Dr. Cox: You know what sucks? I have to hire a new Chief or Surgery. And I just can't fathom giving any of you tiny-brained scalpel jockeys a leadership position. Honestly, so far, this is the only candidate who I'm seriously considering. The guy has the opposable thumbs so you automatically know he can handle the job. And, well, I was just thinking if you slap a diaper on him and maybe tape some glasses to his face, sure as shooting he'll look professional enough. Do you know what? I'm gonna call the gentleman.
Quote from Janitor
Todd: So how's married life?
Janitor: You have to make compromises. Like my wife's allergic to raccoons, so I had to throw out my comforter.