Ben Quote #194
Leslie Knope: We have a ceremony we need to be at in two hours. Is there anything that we can do?
Dr. Clipperton: Sorry, Ice Town, you're not going anywhere for at least a day.
Leslie Knope: Okay, well, I'll call Mayor Stice, and we'll reschedule the ceremony.
Ben: No, this town expects me to wuss out. I'm making that speech, and I'm simply gonna explain to the crowd that love is everywhere and they have to surrender to the flow of the universe, you know? Price Is Right is on, I think. Oh, you remember staying home sick from school... [sobbing] watching The Price Is Right? Oh, God.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Partridge’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] Tom and April were excellent witnesses in my defense. Unfortunately, every single word out of their mouths was a lie. There's only one thing I hate more than lying. Skim milk. Which is water that's lying about being milk.
Quote from Tom
Tom: I don't understand. I was great. I was like Mark Z in The Social "N." My testimony was amazing for your case.
Ron Swanson: But it wasn't the truth. And neither was yours. You even called me a... [whispers] vegetarian. What if that testimony leaks? How will people ever respect me?
April: Ugh, whatever. The truth is stupid. I only tell the truth when it makes me sound like I'm lying.
Tom: Yeah, lying is all I know. It's how I was able to scrape by on the streets of Bombay and make it on the Indian version of Who Wants To Be a Millionaire and get reunited with the love of my life, Latika.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Andy: Ron, hey, let me be your lawyer. I'll object to everything anyone says, trial will go on forever, you don't have to pay. Problem solved.
Ron Swanson: That's a kind offer, Andrew, but I won't be hiring an attorney. I'll represent myself, as I do in all legal matters and livestock auctions.