Leslie Knope Quote #1155
Quote from Leslie Knope in Correspondents' Lunch
Leslie Knope: Okay, I have presents! Um... Chris, we got you an Acai tree because the Acai berry is a superfood.
Chris: And a super gift.
Leslie Knope: Donna, we got you some coffee, because you said, and I quote, "I like my coffee like I like my men. Dark, rich, and full-bodied."
Donna: Yes, indeed.
Leslie Knope: Ann, we got you some very rare Hawaiian fertility tea, guaranteed to help you have a baby.
Ann: That's so nice. Where'd you find that?
Leslie Knope: Well, the busboy at our restaurant told us about a guy who we met in a parking lot, and then he had a backpack full of this stuff, and I'm just realizing now that it's not tea. And I'm gonna throw it away.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Correspondents' Lunch’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Leslie Knope: I have a press conference about the Pawnee Commons in two hours. So I need to go through every email that I've ever sent, ever. I need to know what they might use against me.
Ron Swanson: You can't hack into a typewriter. That's all I have to say.
Leslie Knope: Can it, Unabomber. This is an emergency.
Quote from April
Ben: Andy, are you okay?
Andy: Oh, I'm fine. It's just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I'm always tired. Also, I can't sleep, I'm overeating, none of my old hobbies interest me.
[aside to camera:]
April: Ever since Andy failed the police academy exam, his self-esteem has hit rock bottom. He's always sad and sweaty. He's usually happy and sweaty.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Leslie Knope: Okay, I need more jokes, people. Ben is having his first day at work, so he cannot help me. So I need you guys to pick up the slack.
Ron Swanson: I have a joke for you.
Leslie Knope: Okay.
Ron Swanson: The government in this town is excellent and uses your tax dollars efficiently. [laughs goofily]
Leslie Knope: That's not really a joke, Ron.
Ron Swanson: I disagree. I find it hilarious.