Coach Quote #133

Quote from Coach in Thanksgiving IV

Schmidt: Now, what is the freakin' problem?
Jess: Coach did the opposite of what I asked.
Coach: Come on, Jess, you guys would be great together. It's a dumb rule, all right? Dumb rule. At least he turns you on. Pepper makes my ding-dong and my ping-pongs go into my body.
[flashback:]
Jess: Can somebody help me with this keg?
Pepper: Yeah, sure. Pepper's got it. [grunts]
[present:]
Coach: What if she doesn't know her own strength down there, and...
Nick: Be a nightmare.
Coach: she mushes it, or, like, rips it off and throws it across the room like a hot dog?

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 ‘Thanksgiving IV’ Quotes

Quote from Jess

Nick: So, I saw your butt earlier. It's been holding up nicely.
Jess: It does the trick.
Nick: And I noticed, uh, Ryan left.
Jess: Yeah. Ugh! It's so embarrassing. I kind of came onto him, and he told me he wanted more than just sex.
Nick: He wanted more than sex and that's a bad thing? How?
Jess: Well, look, I'm his boss. We could get sued, and I could get fired. There's a reason it's against the rules.
Nick: You gotta br... okay. Remember when we tried to watch Ferris Bueller's Day Off?
Jess: Okay, I stick by that-- that kid is not a hero. All he does is break rules. What's so great about that?
Nick: You're taking Rooney's side. No one takes Rooney's side.
Jess: I'm a vice principal-- Rooney is my people. Ferris hijacks a parade. That is an act of terror.

Quote from Schmidt

Schmidt: Okay, I summoned everyone to the roof because Bangsgiving is in peril. All of you are focusing on things that have nothing to do with getting laid. Let us please not repeat the mistakes that we made at my Eight Nights of Hump-akah party.

Quote from Nick

Nick: You want to know what I think, 'cause you're not going to like it.
Jess: What?
Nick: I don't think this is about breaking rules. I think Ryan scares you. You like him, and you're going to have to put yourself out there again, and that scares you. But look, life moves really fast. And if you don't stop and
look around once in a while, you just might miss it.
Jess: Is that from Ferris Bueller?
Nick: Yes, it is.
Jess: Okay.
Nick: It's a terrific movie.
Jess: All right.
Nick: And I delivered it perfectly.
Jess: It was pretty good.