Schmidt Quote #73
Quote from Schmidt in Bad in Bed
Nick: So you guys really think you're better at sex than me.
Schmidt: Yeah.
Winston: Absolutely. What did you do after you lost your virginity? What did you say to me?
Nick: Don't say that right now. You're taking it out of context.
Winston: He said, "Winston, is it okay that I didn't get my pants all the way off?"
Schmidt: That's a true story. That really happened.
Nick: I was 16 years old. And I've gotten a lot better.
Schmidt: You haven't gotten that much better. I used to listen to you and Caroline all the time in college. It was like listening to a rescue crew trying to communicate with a stranded miner. "Are you okay?" "Yeah. Are you okay?" "Yeah."
New Girl Quotes
‘Bad in Bed’ Quotes
Quote from Jess
Jess: [British accent] Mr. Darcy's going to love my new bonnet.
Cece: Why are we here?
Jess: You don't understand. You've never been cheated on before. Spencer and I never tried anything new, and maybe if I'd been... more erotic...
Cece: Spencer cheated on you because he's a total jerk, not 'cause you're bad in bed.
Jess: It's been six years. Everything I know about sex, I learned from Spencer or the Clinton impeachment trial.
Quote from Paul
Jess: I just haven't had sex with anyone but Spencer in six years, and I get so nervous. It's like starting a new job with a really weird interview.
Paul: Don't worry about it. I'm good. I'm more than good. It's okay.
Jess: You know what? Tomorrow night. Let's just go out to dinner and then just nail each other. Just pound each other. V-bomb on the P-bomb. [makes explosion noise]
Paul: I would have the... P-bomb, right?
Quote from Jess
Jess: Hey, guys, I don't have much time. Can we get this back on track? I need to know what to do. Would flicking be, like, a cool thing?
Schmidt: No.
Nick: No!
Winston: Absolutely not.
Schmidt: How about role play? Do you know any voices?
Jess: Yes. I can do an old-timey newscaster, like, "Hey there, son, I'm gonna kick you into next Tuesday, see?"