Schmidt: Oh, no, no, it's... it's carpet cleaner. You know, I thought I'd take it right down to the base. I'll probably have to regrow some skin, but it's all right.
Fawn Moscato: It's okay, Schmidt. Look, I understand if you want to break up with me. I'm a laughingstock, and you shouldn't be associated with my brand. Which is tainted. An unfortunate choice of words. So, what was it you wanted to say to me?
Schmidt: Fawn, I don't want to break up with you. I like you just the way that you are. [goes into kiss her]
Fawn Moscato: No offense, but you're terrifying to look at, and you smell like a chemical fire.
Schmidt: Taint that the truth?

Winston: KC? So... um... this is the real me. I'm proud of what I do, I really am. I work with a lot of great people, and I want to be one of them. Plus, if there are ever Ghostbusters, I know they're gonna recruit from law enforcement first. I know you're mad at me. I just came to say that.
KC: I'm not mad that you're a cop. I'm mad that you lied.
Winston: Well, tell you what, uh, is there any way I could take you out again and, you know, uh, be so honest with you that it scares the hell out of you?
KC: I don't know. That uniform is kind of distracting, isn't it? Maybe you should... take it off. [Winston laughs] You lied and said you were a stripper; it seems like the fair thing to do. [dance music playing]
Winston: Just in front of
all these people? In front of your colleagues? [man whoops] Oh, okay. I hear some "whoos!" [whoops] You ain't got no Ginuwine or nothing? Seriously though, I'm... I'm... I really am a police officer. It's... I can't really be here stripping for... you! [whoops] It's a clip-on, ladies. And it's on the ground. Here we go. Uh-huh, I want y'all to get y'all ones ready. I wear my underwear two sizes too big. [laughing] This is a... this is a thing. This is a thing I got to do in order to get my belt off.