Adrian Monk: What do you think?
Captain Stottlemeyer: What do I think? I think it's not possible because he was wearing a computer chip. And he passed all the checkpoints.
Adrian Monk: I know. You're right. That's right.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Unless he took the chip off and passed it off to another runner.
Adrian Monk: That's interesting.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yeah. Maybe he dropped it in another guy's pocket so it looked like he finished the race.
Adrian Monk: That's very interesting. You are a genius.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Anything else I can help you with?
Adrian Monk: [to Sharona] Give him a wipe. Just give him one.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Smudge stays. You go.

Sharona: You know how much a suite costs?
Adrian Monk: Huh?
Sharona: $2,000 a night. You said Tonday was a simple, quiet man, like a poet.
Adrian Monk: So?
Sharona: So how many poets could afford to stay here?
Adrian Monk: What are you saying?
Sharona: I'm saying that he could have made some extra money helping a rich furniture salesman kill his mistress.
Adrian Monk: Shh! That is not possible, okay? It is off the table. End of discussion. Don't touch anything.
Sharona: You're telling me not to touch anything?
Adrian Monk: That's Tonday's fruit.

Tonday: Sorry to keep you waiting. Tonday Mawwaka.
Adrian Monk: Adrian Monk.
Tonday: Ah, Adrian! How nice to meet you.
Adrian Monk: Sir, l I have admired you ever since I was a very strong child-
Sharona: Young child.
Adrian Monk: Young child. This is Sharona, my my something.
Sharona: Ugh. I'm his assistant.

Tonday: You still run?
Adrian Monk: No. No, I quit.
Tonday: Why? There- There was an incident. In high school, during a race.
Adrian Monk: So they broke your spirits.
Tonday: You know, spirits are very fragile, easy to break, but not impossible to repair.
Adrian Monk: I like that.

Sharona: Oh, my God. I love this chair. It vibrates.
Adrian Monk: Sharona, we are not here to shop. This is our primary suspect.
Sharona: Well, maybe we can get a primary suspect discount.

Sharona: You ran 26 miles, and you're not sweating?
Trevor McDowell: I don't sweat that much. You know, some runners don't sweat at all. Is that everything?
Adrian Monk: But here's what's been bothering me. This is you around mile five. Look at your shirt. It's completely drenched. Here's what happened. You had a problem. Her name was Gwen Zaleski. She didn't want to break it off. Maybe she threatened to tell your wife everything and ruin your perfect little world. So you disposed of her. You tossed her off the balcony like a bag of garbage.
Trevor McDowell: Mr. Monk, I love my family. They're my life. And do you think I'm gonna let somebody like you or anybody else take that away from me? So, true or false, Mr. Monk? According to the computer, I ran that entire race from start to finish. True or false?
Adrian Monk: True.
Woman: [over P.A.] Trevor, it's your wife, line two.
Adrian Monk: It's your wife, Trevor. Line two.

Sharona: Are you all right?
Adrian Monk: I'm fine.
Sharona: What happened? You said it was a matter of life or death.
Adrian Monk: I know how he did it.
Sharona: What are you talking about? Who?
Adrian Monk: McDowell. I know how he killed her. I figured it out.
Sharona: You couldn't tell me over the phone?
Adrian Monk: Well, I wanted to see your face light up when I told ya. [off Sharona's look] Okay, I'll take a rain check on that lighting-up thing. Come on, let's go.

Adrian Monk: Sharona, it was right in front of us. We were looking at it all wrong. We thought that Trevor McDowell gave his computer chip to another runner.
Sharona: Like Tonday.
Adrian Monk: Like Tonday, but no other runner had the exact same time, right?
Sharona: Right.
Adrian Monk: I was just watching the tape again, and I realized it wasn't another runner. There was somebody else who ran that whole race from start to finish.
Sharona: Who?
Adrian Monk: The TV camera bike. McDowell never even attached the chip to his shoe. He stuck it somewhere on the vehicle. Maybe he taped it or used one of those magnetic hide-a-key deals. McDowell started the race like everybody else. He followed Tonday and the bike for a few miles. Then, when he got to the curve in the road, Trevor McDowell quit the race, but his computer chip continued on. It didn't miss a single checkpoint. He had a change of clothes hidden in the bushes.
Sharona: Near the batch of chamomile.
Adrian Monk: Exactly. Then, after the murder, he reentered the race just before the end. The finish line was mass confusion. It was easy to rejoin the race. And that was it. He had an airtight alibi. It was the perfect crime. But what happened to the chip? I think it's still on the bike. There was no reason for him to retrieve it. Nobody knew it was there. And even if they did find it, they wouldn't know what it was. Here! Here we are.

Adrian Monk: Trev, you might want to make a note in case it ever comes up again: These new plastic hide-a-keys, turns out they don't sink. Yeah, they float.