Reese Quote #696
Quote from Reese in Hal Coaches
Ed: What are you doing? There's bare patches all over the place. Are you even paying attention to what you're doing?
Reese: Hey, I get grounded plenty, Ed, I know grunt work. So why don't you go fix Mrs. Collins's garage door and get off my back?!
Ed: What did you say?
Reese: You heard me.
Ed: Oh, my God. What do you know?
Reese: Everything. You might want to formulate your megabytes next time you get rid of your computer. Oh, and by the way, Mrs. Swanback?! You are sick!
Ed: Now, keep your voice down. Look, it's not my fault. I try to be faithful... but the women on this block are just so desperate and lonely. It's like I cast some kind of spell. I try to tell 'em no, but it always leads to a back rub.
Reese: I know, Ed, I read all about it.
Martha: [over the fence] Is that you, Ed?
Ed: Ah, I'm a little busy right now, Martha. Look, you can't tell my wife. You can't tell anyone, please. I'll do anything. I'll do anything you ask.
Reese: I can work with that.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Hal Coaches’ Quotes
Quote from Malcolm
Stevie: You were supposed... to meet me... at the library.
Malcolm: Oh, yeah, sorry. You know, I actually found something decent on Ed's computer.
Stevie: The Virts?
Malcolm: Yeah, you create a virtual family, put them in different situations and the computer plays out their lives. I'm putting the characters in right now.
Stevie: Is that... your mom?
Malcolm: Not yet. [turns aggressiveness level to 10] Reese. [turns intelligence down to 0]
Stevie: Make sure... you capture... the blackness... of his soul.
Malcolm: Aggressiveness, ten. Hygiene, zero. OK, now me. Appearance... nine. No, ten. A ten for intelligence. And social skills, ten.
Stevie: Too bad... it doesn't go... higher.
Malcolm: I have social skills, jackass! OK, it's dinner time. Where's Malcolm?
Stevie: Looking at himself... in the mirror.
Quote from Piama
Francis: Look, I'm going to ask you one last time, for the sake of our marriage, what did you do?
Piama: [whispers] Took her parakeet.
Francis: What?
Piama: I took her parakeet!
Francis: You stole the woman's pet? The woman's pet?!
Piama: You protect the people you love. I figured you would do the same for me.
Francis: But I would tell you. And if I was gonna grab someone's parakeet and hold it hostage... Well, jee, I wouldn't do that. How long were you going to keep it for, anyway?
Piama: 'Til she behaved. And if she didn't, I guess I'd have killed it.
Francis: See?! That's where it gets alarming again. But putting aside the horrible nature of the act itself, what's upsetting is, you made this unilateral decision-
Piama: I said I was sorry! How many times do you want me to say it?
Francis: You didn't say you were sorry.
Quote from Lois
Lois: [o.s.] I can't believe you, Dewey! How could you do this?
Reese: When is she going to stop? I'm starving. Go get us some food.
Malcolm: I'm not going out there.
[in the kitchen, Lois and Hal are sitting at the table reading magazines with Dewey nowhere in sight:]
Lois: Sorry doesn't cut it, young man.
Hal: This was a good idea. I just wish you had told me earlier. I was hiding outside for 45 minutes before I came in.
Lois: I saw you.