Francis Quote #189
Quote from Francis in Company Picnic: Part 1
Francis: I was in the locker room and the other coach approached me.
Lavernia: What's that reptilian sack of dog logs trying to pull now?
Francis: He wants to make a wager with you on the outcome of the game. $642, to be exact.
Lavernia: I don't bet. I earn my money and hold on to it.
Francis: He said you'd be afraid.
Lavernia: Oh, he did?
Francis: He also said John Grisham was a hack with no sense of plot and a tin ear for dialogue.
Lavernia: What? He said that about Mr Grisham? Alright, he wants to bet? We'll bet. Tell him to make it 700.
Francis: He was pretty adamant about the $642.
Lavernia: Fine. Hey, Chuck! I need you to hold on to some bet money. That idiot Clarence has no idea what we got in store for him. Easiest 700 I ever made.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Company Picnic: Part 1’ Quotes
Quote from Francis
Malcolm: [answers phone] Hello?
Francis: Malcolm, great. It's Francis. I'm in a real bind up here-
Malcolm: Please, I don't have any money.
Francis: Wait. Hear me out. Tell Mom they're sending all the smart kids to Washington, DC, hit her up for $600 and then spend a long weekend at Stevie's.
Malcolm: Reese, phone.
Reese: [answers phone] Hello?
Francis: Reese, great. Um... you know the hardware store on 2nd? Okay, they got a real slippery entry way...
Reese: Dewey, phone.
Dewey: Francis?
Reese: Yeah.
Dewey: Money?
Reese: Yeah.
[Dewey hangs up the phone]
Quote from Dewey
Dewey: There it is. Kill it.
Hal: Dewey, a spider has just as much right to live as you or I. Besides, it's unlucky to kill it in the house. OK. Hello, little fella. Come on, sweetheart. Oh!
[As the spider tries to run up Hal's arm, he jiggles about as he tries to keep it on the two pieces of paper he's carrying.]
Dewey: [screams]
Hal: Go, go, go! Door! Open the door!
Dewey: The back? Side?
Hal: Side. No, back. No, side! Run!
[As Dewey opens the front door, Lois is standing outside with two bags of groceries. Hal gets to the door and throws the spider off the paper right into Lois, just before Dewey closes the door.]
Hal: Oh, my God, did we just?
Dewey: Go. She can only ground me. Get your keys and go.
Hal: But!
Lois: [o.s.] [screams]
Dewey: Go!
Quote from Hal
Lois: Hal, you're making too much of this.
Hal: No, I am not! If I've learned one thing, you have to make a good first impression. It sets the tone for the entire relationship.
[flashback:]
Man: Hal, this is your new supervisor, Miss Plum.
Miss Plum: It's great to meet you, Hal. I'm really look forward to working with you.
Hal: Same here. [singsong] Oh, and what do we have here? [pats her belly]
Miss Plum: [singsong] My big, fat sto-mach.
[flashback:]
Man: Now, I'd like you to meet your staff, but I'm not quite sure where everyone went.
[Hal's colleagues laughs as he sits bare-cheeked on the photocopier]
[flashback:]
Hal: It is great to meet you, Mr. Jacobson. I just want you to know I'm gonna do a terrific job for you.
Mr. Jacobson: Well, that's great, Hal. I'm sure you are. Have you met my daughter and son-in-law?
Hal: No, I haven't.
Mr. Jacobson: Kelly? Steve? I want you to meet somebody.
Hal: [runs over] Hi. I'm Hal.
Kelly: Hi. So nice to-
[When Hal trips as he reaches the buffet table, he grabs Kelly's necklace, pulling her down onto the food. She crashes to the floor.]
Kelly: [o.s.] Oh, my God! There's a toothpick in my eye!
Steve: She's gushing blood! For God's sake, someone put a tourniquet on her neck!
Kelly: [o.s.] I'm outside of my body. I can see a light. Grandma? Is that you?
Steve: You son of a bitch, I'm going to chew off your face, spit it out and dance on it! I'm gonna kill you! I'm gonna drag your carcass through the street. She's got a toothpick in her eye!
[present:]
Hal: It's like a chess game, Lois. Every subtle move is vital.