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Motivational Speaker

‘Motivational Speaker’

Season 6, Episode 19 -  Aired April 24, 2005

When Hal is forced to attend a corporate seminar, he ends up replacing the motivational speaker. Meanwhile, Dewey upsets Lois by spending time with another mom, and Reese joins a pack of dogs.

Quote from Hal

Hal: Gerry, did you know that Michael Jordan didn't even see a basketball until he was 30 years old?
Gerry: No, no. I didn't know that.
Hal: Who tied your tie this morning, Gerry?
Gerry: I did.
Hal: Somebody just came in, pulled up your pants, shaved your face, combed back that lovely head of hair?
Gerry: No. I did it all myself.
Hal: You... did it all by yourself. You... were in charge this morning, Gerry. But somehow when you walked out that door, you let the world take over.


Quote from Hal

Hal: So what are you going to do, Giant Gerry?
Gerry: I'm gonna take that promotion! And I'm gonna become head of Systems Management!
Hal: I- I'm in Systems Management.
Gerry: Damn right you are! And I'm gonna take you off these seminars and I'm gonna put you on my team full time. [crowd cheers] I'm gonna work that department, and I'm gonna work it until it's the strongest one in the whole company! And I'm gonna push my workers until they've given me everything that they've got. And then they can all say good-bye to their families 'cause I'm driving straight to the top! [crowd cheers]

Quote from Reese

Reese: Man, that was amazing! They won't be leaving any more messages on our side of the park! Where we going now, Lucky, huh? Lucky, where you leading us? [dogs roll over] Really? You guys mean it? All right, I won't let you guys down. Let's roll! [dogs follow Reese]

Quote from Lois

Lois: You found him in a chicken coop?!
Police Officer: Well, it's hard to know exactly what happened, ma'am. He and his friends appeared to have had themselves quite a little party. They just don't train ya to handle a scene like that. The law's a little murky in this area, but when we figure out how to charge him I'll be back.

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